Darren Kanthal With The Kanthal Group Candid Career Coaching

Intro: [00:00:02] Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX Studios in Atlanta, Georgia. It’s time for Coach the Coach radio brought to you by the Business RadioX Ambassador Program, the no cost business development strategy for coaches who want to spend more time serving local business clients and less time selling them. Go to BRXAmbassador.com To learn more. Now here’s your host.

Lee Kantor: [00:00:32] Lee Kantor here, another episode of Coach the Coach Radio, and this is going to be a fun one today on the show, we have Darren Campbell with The Kanthal Group candid career coaching. Welcome, Darren.

Darren Kanthal: [00:00:44] Thank you. It’s good to be here.

Lee Kantor: [00:00:45] Well, I am excited to learn what you’re up to. Tell us about candid career coaching. How are you serving, folks?

Darren Kanthal: [00:00:51] You know, there’s a little bit of a story, of course, and without being too long winded, my story starts in corporate America, which quite frankly, was not my place. Arguably, I was too candid. I would say I had a lack of discretion during that time frame, and when I felt like I experienced in corporate America was don’t talk about real problems, talk about surface stuff and move forward. And I didn’t grow up that way in my house. We talked about conversations and we were deep about the things we talked about. And so my coaching practice, I get I hope it’s OK to curse. I get cut through the bullshit, talk about the real things and help people move forward.

Lee Kantor: [00:01:31] Now what drew you initially to this corporate kind of career like so you were going through, you know, high school college and you were aiming at corporate and then you realize once you were there that that wasn’t the right fit? Or was it something you were kind of like on autopilot? This is what people like me do. We get a job at corporate?

Darren Kanthal: [00:01:52] You know, interestingly enough, my father was an entrepreneur my whole life, and he passed away in nineteen ninety seven in August. I graduated college in December of ninety seven and no joke. My dad’s side of the family is Jewish. So is Shiva, my uncle who like five foot four Puerto Rican guy strong as an ox said to me, You’re going to run your dad’s business. And being in shock that my father was passed, I was like, Yeah, I’m sure I could do it. And he held me by the shoulders and looked me in the face and said, No, you are going to run your father’s business. And that 30 second exchange was it meaning I finished my last semester of college and I took over my dad’s business. So when I left college, I was an entrepreneur from the gate or out of the gate. You know, my stories got some sympathy in there. I had a house fire. A couple of years later, I lost all of my stuff, personal and professional. Truth be known as the business was a dying breed, and I let it go. And without much of an idea of what to do next, I found myself in corporate America, stayed there for, I don’t know, 15 or 18 years. And without knowing it, I had this entrepreneurial burning inside of me or this entrepreneurial spirit. And in my last corporate gig, I had a boss, my last boss, who was the worst boss of my entire career. And I hired my own career coach and my words to her were I got to figure out how to play nice in these sandboxes. And The Sandbox is our corporate America and these bosses that I did respect. And her words to me were, Maybe you should change the sandbox. So just like the words of Uncle Ralph, a 30 second exchange with my coach led me down the path of I’m going to be an entrepreneur. And that led me to coach in.

Lee Kantor: [00:03:46] Now going, having gone through what you’ve gone through kind of makes you uniquely qualified to help a wide swath of folks, I would think because you’ve. Kind of were involved in the entrepreneurial pursuit. You know, maybe before you were really ready for it and you’ve kind of got all the scar tissue from corporate America, so you can really empathize for from an entrepreneur’s point of view as well as kind of a corporate refugees point of view.

Darren Kanthal: [00:04:17] They’re the corporate refugee. I like that. Yeah, I like to believe so when people ask me about my value proposition. Again, sometimes long winded, long winded, but I talk about a few things. First is I’m a New Yorker and I resonate with being a New Yorker, meaning I’m direct. I do speak with empathy, and I get that feedback before which I love and allows you to cut through the bullshit, as I said earlier. So that’s one. Two is yes, I have fallen flat on my face in corporate America. I’ve been beat up. I’ve been shut out. As a 30 year old man, I literally called my mom crying because I got let go from a job. And yet again, I was pointing the finger at myself, saying, What’s wrong with me? So I’ve been I’ve been around my own block. And interestingly enough, is the people that are drawn to me are often in similar boats, meaning they are unhappy at work and they don’t understand why their ideas are not being heard or explored. They, too, are finding that they’re working for leaders they don’t respect. And this is my story. All those things are the same for me. And so yes, I have a unique perspective. I started as an entrepreneur, as a young man, and I think you are right. I don’t think I was ready for it, but life didn’t really allow me to be ready. So that was it. I was raised to be independent and to rely on myself to make things happen, and that comes out in the way I conduct myself and my coaching. But yeah, I do think I’m well positioned to coach the folks that I work with now.

Lee Kantor: [00:05:48] What drew you kind of to the HR side of business and this career counseling or career coaching? Like, what about that kind of niche? Is what is what’s attractive to you? So what do you like about it?

Darren Kanthal: [00:06:06] Yeah. You know, I like a lot of people, I kind of stepped in air by accident and maybe it wasn’t really by accident, but in I think I think it was 2000. I had two interviews in New York City where I was living. One was with Samuel Adams, which is a Big East Coast beer brand. It’s kind of like fat tire out here in Denver. And I had this other interview with a recruiting firm, and without going into too many details, I accepted the job in the recruiting firm. And and that was the start of my HR career. And how it kind of morphed is I was good at it. It allowed me to kind of drive the ship. I was autonomous. I got to play quarterback. So there was an element of control in there, which I do have a little bit of control freak in me. And I was good at it, as I said. And so I went from a recruiter to leading teams. I was an our business partner, had a unique title out of Fortune, one hundred company of a talent acquisition program manager. So throughout my career, I had both had to influence with authority and also at times influence without authority. And the way that’s parlayed into my entrepreneurism now is that I’ve learned a great deal about the job search process. So the tactics and strategies of how to go about finding jobs. I also did a lot of work with professional development. So for those people that are either gainfully employed or aren’t quite sure what they want to be when they grow up, I’ve got a lot of coaching tools and H.R. tools that I can bring to the table to help folks figure that stuff out. And it all serves me very well, and especially I’ve heard from some clients is that it does give me some validity that I’m not just some guy off the street saying I can help you find a new job or whatever may be is that I’ve got that HR background and people value that. So it’s pretty cool for me.

Lee Kantor: [00:08:00] Now when you’re working, are you working typically with that executive or maybe the middle manager that wants to level up? Or maybe that new executive that hasn’t had this maybe leadership training before? Or is it a firm hires you to coach a bunch of their people? Like what is your engagement typically look like?

Darren Kanthal: [00:08:20] Yeah, it could be any of the above, which is a very broad stroke, what I would say is where I’m really carving out a niche is what I call the non c level executives. And I use that word executive a little loosely, and that could be shame on me, if you will. But more directly, as I work with the new leader up until the leader who is not quite at that C level or aspires to be. And it’s a really good it’s it’s a place that I know because that’s where I played to be direct. I did not achieve the sea level and, you know, I’ve not sat in the boardroom and some people say that makes puts me at a disadvantage to coach those folks. But the mid-level folks, those are the ranks that I achieved in corporate. I relate well to them. I find that oftentimes they’re quite willing to do the self work that’s required. Self-reflection, contemplation open the growth, quite frankly, exploring their emotions and how that drives their actions. And so I’ve really carved out quite a nice niche with middle management or those non C-level executives.

Lee Kantor: [00:09:27] And then what? What is typically the the impetus of them contacting you? Or are they just frustrated or they, you know, in kind of uncharted territory what is usually that trigger that creates that first engagement with you?

Darren Kanthal: [00:09:45] It’s usually multifaceted, but yes, it typically is built upon something in the frustration bucket. They’re frustrated, they’re annoyed, they’re unhappy, they’re unfulfilled, there’s dissatisfied, they’re stuck, they’re questioning the decisions they’ve made about their career. And oftentimes they’re not often, excuse me. Oftentimes enough. A spouse or significant significant other has not given an ultimatum per say, but it said something’s got to change because you husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, whoever it is, you’re spending more time at work than you are at home, and the person contacting me is starting to realize that their life is out of balance. And so when they come to me, oftentimes these middle managers, non sea level execs are gainfully employed, and the way I describe it is they want to level up. They want to be better at life and at work. And oftentimes what I’m seeing is that their own internal struggle, their own internal insecurities, saboteurs, if you will, are holding them back. And what I get to do is the term I like to say is I help help them see the forest through the trees, recognize who they are, what role they’re playing in the outcomes of their life. And if we partner well together. I said oftentimes I think 12 times now, but oftentimes we see growth in them as human beings, their minds are more at ease. The conversations they have with themselves are more positive and the outcomes are greater performance at work. Healthier relationships and their own health and wellness improves.

Lee Kantor: [00:11:27] Now you use the word saboteur earlier, is that something that the people you deal with and maybe just humans as a whole have some built in saboteurs when it comes to their own behavior, their own thinking that they don’t see it? Maybe it’s, you know, subconscious unconscious that they are. They think they’re doing the same thing, but they’re kind of repeating the same mistakes over and over, and it is kind of a self-inflicted wound.

Darren Kanthal: [00:11:57] One, 100 percent. There is a program that has been life changing to me that I’ve also gotten certified in, and I get to lead others through it, which is called positive intelligence. It’s a very simple, very simple conceptually, and there’s a practice and a structure behind it without getting too detailed into it. Just at this moment is, yes, what you’re saying is one hundred percent accurate. We, as humans have these things behaviors, thoughts, actions, tics, nuances, whatever you want to call them, that are typically born from something fear based. Something negative. Insecurity. Fear of failure. Fear of being embarrassed. Fear looking foolish. Fear of something. And often what we do is we have these coping mechanisms to protect ourselves. And yet these coping mechanisms are often sabotaging us in the same way as protecting us, which sounds so bizarre to say, but it’s really what happens. So yes, we all have them in some way, shape or form. And the question becomes, are you is one willing to explore them and be open to what they may be doing to you?

Lee Kantor: [00:13:10] Now, can you share? Obviously, don’t name a name, but an example of what one of these? Kind of sabotage, sabotage, sabotage behaviors were with some. One of your clients so that maybe the listener can understand that this could be happening to them. To me, an area to explore in this under this kind of topic would be if you’re making the same or you’re you’re there’s a saying that says if you see a jerk. Today, you’ve seen the jerk today, but if you’ve seen a jerk every day, you might be the jerk. Is there anything that you can share like from your experience where you’ve seen a person just like, I don’t know why this is happening every time I do this, this outcome happens in these crazy people are all like, they don’t even see that it’s them that is at the heart of the the problem. But it just like kind of like, Wow, this is just everybody’s conspiring against me again.

Darren Kanthal: [00:14:14] It’s funny you say that. I’m laughing because I’m going to use myself as the example. I love the jerk analogy, too. That’s perfect. I love it in the world of positive intelligence. The names of the saboteurs are very simple. It’s things like controller, stickler, pleaser, avoider, victim, hyper achiever, hyper rational. And there’s two more that I’m forgetting off the top of my head. So these words, without even knowing the work of positive intelligence, I’m sure you and listeners can start to form what conclusion they may about those very names of saboteurs. For me, my top two are restless and controller. Now, it’s also important to point out that there’s a tense saboteur that we all have, and it’s simply called the judge. And some people relate to it as the imposter within us, the inner critic. I’ve heard people call it my dark angel. I’ve heard it referred to as Achilles heel. Whatever you want to call it, great holistically in peak intelligence. We call it the judge. Now, for me, very specifically, is my judge convinced me that I was unworthy. I was not good enough. I’m not smart enough. I’m not good looking enough. And when things go wrong, of course, it’s my fault. And because I was coming from a place of a lack of worthiness. Bottom line is I was insecure about who I was. In order to try to compensate for that. The way I showed up was, I had to prove to you that I was right and that I was worthy because I had something to offer a situation based upon intelligence that was typically how I showed up.

Darren Kanthal: [00:15:56] And so my controller would show up in the sense of give it to me, I’ll do it and I’ll do it because I have to show you that I’m capable of doing it and prove it to myself as well. And that showed itself in a million different ways, anyone who is a control freak in any way, shape or form, I’m guessing, can relate. I’ll have some people in my life who are pleasers. I won’t name names. The pleaser often puts themselves second to you, being first. And what happens is the beautiful thing, right? We find them very altruistic and caring and that kind of good thing. The challenge is for the pleaser is they give so much to others and put themselves second, third, fourth that they become resentful. They bottle up their emotions. They start to have their own self-worth issues because they say, I do all this stuff for everyone else and no one does anything for me. So these are just two examples. There’s many more. And and I find that a lot of people can relate to being a pleaser, doing a lot for others or being a control and saying just give it to me because I’ll do it.

Lee Kantor: [00:17:02] Now in your work, you use the phrase emotional arborist. Can you explain that?

Darren Kanthal: [00:17:08] Yeah. I’m laughing, I was working with a with a coach who helped me with a keynote speech I was putting on. And when he asked me what I did, I told him I was an executive coach and he sarcastically and he’s like, Yeah, I know a million of those. And so over time, the emotional outburst was really borne because I love the image of trees. There’s something about nature and tree. I’m so drawn to that image. And as I was talking to my coach about the work of positive intelligence, my love for trees, he came up with the emotional arborist. So I give him all the credit for that. And depending on the setting, when someone says, Hey, what do you do? I say I’m an emotional arborist and like Smokey the Bear, I believe only you can prevent unintentional wildfires, emotional wildfires. And if someone is like, All right, what does that mean? The story says, I get to work with clients on three things. The first is your roots and just like a tree. We know that when you a human being man or woman, when your roots are strong, you feel confident. You feel secure. You feel competent. You feel happy. You feel positive. Now, just like a tree, we know that when you have really strong roots, you also need the right environment to grow. The right environment could be the right job, the right boss, the right relationship, the right house, the right physical location. We know that just like trees, when we have strong roots and the right environment, our canopies thrive, we perform great at work. We have really healthy relationships. Life is good. So as an emotional arborist, I get to work on my clients to strengthen their roots, find the right environment and watch them thrive.

Lee Kantor: [00:18:55] Now, if somebody wants to learn more, get on your calendar or learn more about the different programs or coaching opportunities, what is the best way to get a hold of you? You have a website.

Darren Kanthal: [00:19:05] I do so there’s there’s two ways I am lucky enough to be the only Darren Campbell on LinkedIn, and I am quite certain. Our family of cannibals is the only ones in the United States. My grandparents emigrated from Germany and during World War Two. So Darren Kanth on LinkedIn and my website is candid career coaching.

Lee Kantor: [00:19:28] Good stuff, Darren. Thank you so much for sharing your story today. You’re doing important work and we appreciate you.

Darren Kanthal: [00:19:34] Thank you, we appreciate you, too. Thanks a lot.

Lee Kantor: [00:19:36] All right, this is Lee Kantor, we’ll see you next time on Coach the Coach radio.