Intro: Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX studios in Atlanta, Georgia. It’s time for High Velocity Radio.

Stone Payton: Welcome to the High Velocity Radio show, where we celebrate top performers producing better results in less time. Stone Payton here with you this afternoon. Please join me in welcoming to the broadcast with Lauren Berlin Coaching and Consulting the lady herself, Ms. Lauren Berlin, how are you?

Lauren Berlin: Hi Stone, I’m doing well. Thank you so much for having me today. Well, I.

Stone Payton: Have really been looking forward to this conversation. Tons to talk about. I’m thinking of good place to start would be mission. Purpose. What are you really out there trying to do for folks with your practice?

Lauren Berlin: Yeah. You know, I my origin story really starts in a pool. And I grew up a competitive swimmer and, you know, lived a first hand experience about how a coach can entirely change a trajectory for an athlete, for better or for worse. And that contrast is something that really stuck with me as a coach now, not for athletes, but for, you know, parents, for leaders, for executives. Um, it’s really about making sure that people can take themselves to that next level. Um, you can’t see the the label of the jar that you’re inside of, right. And so coaching is about getting that outside perspective. I really want people to be able to live into their full potential. And that is what a great coach does. Um, helping them reach those places they can’t reach alone. So that’s why I do this work.

Stone Payton: So what was it like in the early days, like the transition from what you were doing before to being a professional coach? It had to be, I would think, a little bit intimidating, a little bit scary, but maybe not for for an athlete, I don’t know.

Lauren Berlin: Uh, no. It’s scary every day. Um, and I’m still very much I, you know, I think I approach life as a curious beginner. Um, I think that’s just sort of the nature of who I am. Um, my background is in public education. That’s where I started my career and really believe that we’re all lifelong learners. And there’s always something more to be curious about. Um, that’s how we improve every day. And so, um, you know, I don’t I’m not sure if there’s ever a day I don’t feel like a beginner at something. Um, and I’m here for that. Like, I really like to embrace that mindset. Um, it really creates an opportunity for growth. Um, and so that’s something that I really embrace in my own life. Um, as a parent for my kids, um, and then also for the clients that I work with.

Stone Payton: So what are you finding the most rewarding? What’s the most fun about it these days for you.

Lauren Berlin: Oh, um, I mean, it’s pretty easy, right? When I there. That question is, um, when I’m working with a client and they have that moment where they’ve really put the pieces together about, you know, a challenge that they had, why they felt stuck somewhere. And, I mean, you can you can see it in their eyes, stone like, they start to like they literally like light up and like, I can I swear in person or through the zoom, I can see their eyes start to sparkle. And as a coach, like that moment where you can see, like they’re leaving this session in a totally different place than they entered, and they have clarity about something really important for them. I mean, that is that’s the moment, and that’s what just keeps me coming back for more as a coach.

Stone Payton: So I’m trying to envision the level of trust that you must have to endure in this relationship pretty quickly. On to be of any real service. Is that something that came natural to you, or is there are there operational disciplines and tactics and mechanics to build trust? But I got to believe for to sit down with a coach and open up enough to really be helped, you got to really trust the coach. Yeah.

Lauren Berlin: Totally. I mean, trust is the foundation for any good work in progress. Um, your question sort of makes me think of, of two things. One, a question I get asked a lot, which is how do you, like, know if you’re considering working with a coach? How do you find a coach? Um, and it’s really because the trust starts there, right? It’s in feeling like this coach is going to they’re going to get me. Maybe they’ve been where I’ve been before, or maybe I just feel like a sense of connection with this person. Um, one thing, you didn’t ask me this, but I’m going to share it anyway. That I really recommend to people is if you’re considering starting to work with a coach, go out and interview them, right? Ask for discovery calls or for chemistry calls. Every coach I know will do that. We do them for free because we we want to be a fit for you, right? It’s like just because you’re a size seven shoe doesn’t mean that they’re all going to feel good on your feet because they’re your size, right? They might not be your style, they might not be the right color. And so it’s really the same with a coach.

Lauren Berlin: You want to find somebody who is going to be a good fit for you. And that’s a that could be about vibe, about feel, about communication style. So part of the trust is in, in really starting with the right client and with the right coach. Um, and from there, you know, I, my clients like to, to do the big work, to do the deep work, you have to get really vulnerable. And so you build trust through through really listening. Um, I do a lot less talking when I’m with my clients that I am right now. Um, and so it’s a lot of listening and really for the purpose of seeking to understand where they are, not to judge, not to give them solutions, but really just to sit and hear them really process through what’s going on for themselves. So I think by, you know, when you’re with holding space with the person who’s a good fit for you. Um, and then creating these opportunities to allow them, you know, to share this information that that bond and that connection just really start to build. But you’re right. Trust is a really key element to a coaching relationship.

Stone Payton: Well, and I suppose as a client, it just occurred to me, I guess you got to kind of trust yourself too, right? That it’s going to be. Yeah.

Lauren Berlin: And to, to really, I think be brave to put it all out there, um, to say the thing that, you know, we all have those, whether it’s like a limiting thought or a belief or, um, whoever’s that like, little like, Darth Vader voice on our shoulder. You know, whoever that that guy is or that gal is that, you know, shares some of those negative messages that you hear in your head to to say those out loud. Um, like, this is what I’m struggling with or when I try to make a brave move or make a bold step, here’s what I’m hearing. You know, it takes courage to share that. Um, and so I think you’re right that for clients, um, being really vulnerable and opening us up, they have to trust themselves to do that, too.

Stone Payton: So let’s dive into the work a little bit. Maybe you can paint a bit of a picture, maybe a use case. Of course, you wouldn’t want to name names, but, uh, walk us through what that process looks like. I’m particularly interested personally in the front end of the process, but I bet our listeners would love to hear a little bit about how it unfolds as well.

Lauren Berlin: Yeah, let me start if it’s okay by um, because I think it’s helpful, you know, like, what’s a coach, what’s a consultant, what’s a therapist? And sometimes people get a little confused in that space. And so one of the things I think it’s really important to share, because it’s I think one of the biggest misconceptions is that when you start working with a coach that, you know, if you come to me, I’m a professional problem solver and like, here’s going to be my five step plan to just fix everything, or here’s my, like, proprietary acronym program. Um, and that’s not at all what it is. So um, for me specifically, um, and I’m a I’m trained by the Hudson Institute of Coaching, and I’m a credentialed coach through the International Coaching Federation. Um, so those are I share that, um, because it paints a picture sort of of of who I am as a coach. Um, but before that, I’m an educational school psychologist. I’m also a board certified behavior analyst. So. Right, every coach is going to bring their personality flavors into the work that they do with the clients. So to answer your question, for me and my approach, it’s a little bit like having a behavior scientist and a coach in your corner at the same time. Um, I feel like I’m always digging a little deeper below the surface to really get into the why, and I’m really fascinated by that.

Lauren Berlin: Um, I can give you an example. Um, if you one of the things that I, I frame in my thinking is every behavior we have as humans serves a function. It’s often that we’re trying to escape something or we’re trying to gain something. But our environment also plays a really big role in our successes or our challenges in meeting a goal. And so an example that I would give you, um, I’ll just make this one up. It’s not not one of my real clients, but, um, but I think it’s something that we can all connect with is the idea that, like, I want to be doing more exercise, or I know that if I went on a walk or if I got out to the gym, that I would feel better, right? Um, and yet I just can’t leave the office on time because I keep getting stuck in a meeting and, you know, oh, I had to send that one last email. And so I’m not getting out to the gym and like, oops, I’ve missed that class again. And so, you know, I’ll try again next week. Right. So that sort of cycle of like set the goal, have these barriers and then not meet the goal. Um, what I would do and what as I was working with a client who was facing some concerns like that, it looks like a time management issue.

Lauren Berlin: Right. But oftentimes if you dig a little deeper, you can understand more what’s happening. So maybe it’s that this client, um, is really socially motivated. And so it’s hard for them to leave the office because they talk to everybody on the way out the door or there’s a standing meeting and they they want to stay. They’re engaged in that conversation. They like that. Right. So it’s like having those conversation, being engaged with their coworkers, their colleagues. That is a place that feels good to them. And going to the gym maybe doesn’t feel as great. So something that we might explore is in manipulating maybe the timing, maybe the environment. So if that time is going to present a challenge, it can that standing meeting move or can um, or can the exercise time move. Also if it’s social and that’s going to be really a pull or like a carrot for that person, can they set up a gym class with a friend or with a colleague or with a coworker where they go together? So if you pull some different threads to start to figure out what’s really going into those barriers, it’s probably not just about time management or boundaries. And how can we start to connect the dots and make some shifts within the environment that make it easier for that person to be successful in achieving that goal. Does that make sense?

Stone Payton: Absolutely. No, that’s very clear. So have you found yourself over the years gravitating to a certain type of client or industry or anything like that, or is it pretty broad based and agnostic?

Lauren Berlin: Um, I think it’s like a both things are true.

Lauren Berlin: I think what I find consistently a thread I see with a lot of my clients is there’s some kind of a limiting belief that’s holding them back. Um, when we kind of get through to the root cause. So, um, they’ve got this sort of, like, overactive security guard, like, getting in the way of their progress. Can you imagine it? Right. Like, I love a good visual. Um, and so and so it’s really, um, there’s often times, like, maybe a connection to perfectionism or a sense of like familial obligation or duty. Um, that really makes it hard for my clients to prioritize themselves. Um, I’m often seeing clients that are in that, um, that second act of life. I don’t know if you’ve seen Jane Fonda talking about a life in three acts, but in that messy middle stage, that 30 to 60. So a lot of my clients are, you know, at that point where their careers are starting to really accelerate and they’re also maybe parents becoming parents or caregiving for their parents. So I do see a lot of clients like in that, in that messy middle where they have some caregiver duties that they’re trying to balance also while their jobs are really taking off. So it’s a lot of, um, a lot of my clients are in that sort of burning the candle at both ends phase and dealing with a lot of transitions.

Stone Payton: So have you had the opportunity? And as I’m framing this question, I’m thinking the answer is yes. So I ask you to speak to it, but I’ll ask it anyway. Have you had the the benefit of one or more mentors to help you kind of navigate that terrain, of being in the coaching business and practicing the craft, and then the whole business side of being in the coaching business.

Lauren Berlin: Yes. Um, when I when I think about mentors, I mean, I really do go all the way back to my, to my competitive swimming days. I mean, I think of my a coach I had through junior high and high school who I learned so much from about how to be a teammate, how to how to grow up as a teen, um, how to be a person, how to be an athlete. So, I mean, that’s somebody who I think about a lot. Um, and, and then as a business, um, learning all of this is new for me, right? Like how to be a business owner. So I’ve had some I have had and have some incredible mentors, um, who are helping me learn like the marketing end of things. Um, who are walking me through, um, I think it’s like the tips and tricks, but also, you know, I’m really looking to not learn. Here’s what I want to say. It is really easy to be inundated with information right now, right? Like, you can Google what are the top five marketing strategies? Or you can ask ChatGPT, you know, to write you a four quarter strategic plan for a new business. Um, so there’s a lot of tools and things out there. But for me, what’s been really beneficial is reaching out directly to some of my mentors who’ve either been there or know me really well and can think about how do I how do I do these things? How do I learn these things? How do I grow as a business and really stay authentic and true to myself? Um, I’m not for everybody. No. Coach is. And so it’s like, how do I find the right clients for me? Like we talked about that, you know, making the shoe fit. Yeah. Um, and and, you know, really making sure that my message gets out there in an authentic way.

Stone Payton: So at this point in your journey, how does the whole sales and marketing thing work? Like, how do you get the new businesses it all referral based at this point, or do you still have to get out there and shake the trees a little bit like the rest of us?

Lauren Berlin: Yes. I mean, a referral is great, right? Because those are the clients that I’ve served telling other people like, hey, this was a great experience. Reach out to her. I mean, so that that is both um, I mean, that’s a that’s the biggest compliment there can be, right? Is that that my, my services were so supportive and they met their goals to the extent that they want to tell other people. So that’s amazing. And then and then yes, it’s a lot of, you know, getting out there making connections, thinking about, you know, where might the people be who you know that are in my second act of life, dealing with that messy middle? Where do I find them? How do they know that I exist? So it is lots of conversations, um, joining different groups, networking, um, and really trying to to just meet folks through, through genuine and authentic connection.

Stone Payton: And again, and I think you mentioned this earlier, you have those conversations and you may be able to serve in some way, even at that more superficial level. But it’s important if you’re going to do real work with them. I think you was it you or someone else I talked to that talked about a chemistry call or a discovery call. You’ve really got to that. That has to be there, or it’s, uh, doesn’t make either person a bad person, but you gotta it’s not the right fit. Right.

Lauren Berlin: Exactly. And I, I mean, I think if you have, you know, if there’s potential coaches, potential clients on this call, one thing I would hope that they walk away with is knowing that, like doing those chemistry calls or those discovery calls is really important. And it’s okay to tell a coach like, thank you. I don’t feel like we’re a fit. They want to know, like they. I don’t want to serve someone who doesn’t feel like I’m a good match for them. Because if they’re showing up and at a place where they really feel like this is going to be good and important for their life stage, or to help them through or with whatever challenge they’re facing, um, I want them to make that progress authentically. I’m a coach because I really believe in the power of transformation that this work does. And so if I’m not the right person for you, that is totally okay. And so it’s okay to say, like, thank you so much for your time. Um, I’m going to pursue other options. No coach is going to fault you for saying that or whatever. I mean, if they do, that tells you something about the coach, as I guess what I would say.

Stone Payton: No, I’m so glad that you articulated that. That’s very that’s very important. So what is next for you? Is there a book in you? Is is there replicating the the the Lauren Berlin methodology and certifying other people to do, uh, like on the horizon. Any designs on anything like that in terms of scaling or you’ve kind of found your groove?

Lauren Berlin: Um, right now I send out a weekly newsletter. I love to just share, you know, like bite sized pieces of information. Um, it might be, um, a habit, you know, a habit change suggestion. It might be sharing a story from my life. Um, and, you know, an aha moment that I had and sharing that with my client. So I send out a newsletter every week on Friday afternoons. Um, that’s called Inner Spark. And the hope is that it just sparks, you know, it’s just a it’s a little tidbit. It’s a little nugget. I like to share that, um, with my with my readers, with my audience. Um, and I’m in the process of developing a digital course around habit change. So for folks who are maybe ready to. I used my story about the woman who just can’t get to that gym class. Um, and so for people who are maybe really thinking about a habit that they want to change a new routine, a behavior that they, you know, have been trying to to sort out and just can’t get around the other side. I don’t know, the way I think of it is they can’t get out of their own way.

Lauren Berlin: So I’m working on a digital course that would speak to someone in that situation so that they could really work. Um, work through that course. Um, so subscribing to my newsletter would also be the way to get any updates on that course when it’s available, and probably in about a month and a half.

Stone Payton: Oh, fantastic. Someone switched gears. With your permission, I’m going to switch gears with you for a moment. Hobbies. Interests. Pursuits outside the scope of coaching. A lot of my listeners know that I like to hunt, fish, and travel. Anything you’d like to nerd out about that’s outside the scope of this?

Lauren Berlin: Yeah. Cook, read and travel. So those are. Those are my big three. I love to cook. Um, it is a routine for me that’s, like, really de-stressing. At the end of the day, I, um, I’m looking at my cookbook collection, which is organized in a rainbow order on my shelf over there. So that is something that really brings me joy. Um, I am not a great cook, but I really enjoy to cook. Um, and I read a lot, I think I well, I read and I listen to audiobooks. Um, but last year I think I got through more than about a hundred titles. So I love mystery thriller, I read some romance novels. I read a lot in business development, self-help, um, and so and listen to podcasts. So I consume a lot of content. Um, and then travel is something I love to do.

Stone Payton: Well, I have to believe that some of the travel inspires some of the cooking. Is that accurate?

Lauren Berlin: Absolutely true. Yes.

Lauren Berlin: Absolutely. And it did. And it also inspires the the future destination list. Right. So travel.

Lauren Berlin: For food. Yeah. Mhm.

Stone Payton: Oh before we wrap I would love to leave our listeners with a, with a couple of pro tips. If we could just some things to be noodling on. Maybe it is a book uh you know a good read that could uh stimulate and challenge their, their thinking. Maybe it’s a do or don’t you’ve learned from just living life, or maybe it’s an idea for, uh, another practitioner and building their business, or someone considering taking advantage of someone with specialized expertise in this domain. And look, gang, the number one pro tip is reach out and have a conversation with Lauren. That’s your that’s your number one Pro tip. But yeah let’s leave them with a little something to to chew on.

Lauren Berlin: I would love to um, and I thought about this a little bit. What I want people to know is that change does not have to be overwhelming. And I want to put on my behavior analyst hat here and tell you, um, it’s not about a massive overhaul. You do not have to reinvent yourself when you can start to understand the patterns and how making really small, strategic, strategic shifts in your life that starts to create those ripples, that tiny change is that pebble in a pond and the impact spreads. And so whether that’s me as a coach, if you need someone to help you find that right pebble to drop, I can be here for you. If you want to try some things yourself, give it a go and it’s okay if you miss a day. Forget. Don’t do it the right way. Just taking any action moves you into action, and building that momentum is the most important part.

Stone Payton: I am so glad I asked. That sounds like terrific counsel. All right. What’s the best way for our listeners to stay connected, tap into your work and maybe have a conversation with you at some point.

Lauren Berlin: Yeah. You can find me at my website, which is my name, Lauren Berlin Coaching.com. There’s a link to subscribe to my newsletter in the header. It should be easy to find. So you can follow me there. Um, and I think the other thing I would recommend, one of my favorite reads from last year, Stone is the Five Resets by Doctor Aditi Nerurkar. Um, and it’s really gets into some specific, um, habit change for, for kind of the major issues that are facing that a lot of folks are facing. So it’s a great read. Um, if folks are looking to to dig a little deeper on habit change, the Five Resets is a book I would really highly recommend.

Stone Payton: Yeah, and that website one more time.

Lauren Berlin: Lauren Berlin Coaching.com.

Stone Payton: What an absolute delight to visit with you on the broadcast this afternoon. This has been an inspiring, invigorating conversation. I feel like I’ve learned a lot. I know that our listeners have your. You’re clearly out there doing terrific work for some people that are truly benefiting. We sure appreciate you, Lauren.

Lauren Berlin: Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. It’s such a pleasure.

Stone Payton: My pleasure. All right. This is Stone Payton for our guest today, Lauren Berlin with Lauren Berlin coaching and consulting and everyone here at the Business RadioX family saying we’ll see you in the fast lane.