Intro: Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX studios in Atlanta, Georgia. It’s time for High Velocity Radio.

Stone Payton: Welcome to the High Velocity Radio show, where we celebrate top performers producing better results in less time. Stone Payton here with you this afternoon and this is going to be a good one. Please join me in welcoming to the Broadcast executive, business and leadership coach, Michelle Cox. How are you?

Michelle Cox: I’m doing fantastic. Thank you.

Stone Payton: Oh, man, I got so much. I want to talk about a ton of questions, but maybe to begin with give us a little bit of an overview. How are you out there helping folks, Michelle?

Michelle Cox: Yeah. So I work with executives, usually at director or above level and really looking at elevating their leadership. And I find that there’s a huge correlation to your leadership as well as your role. They go hand in hand. So if you’re looking to go to the next level, then it’s let’s start with your leadership. How are you leading.

Stone Payton: When you’re getting your arms around that and trying to help them think through it? Or I’m sure the answer is yes, but I’m going to ask anyway. Are you seeing some patterns, like what are some of the most prevalent things that you feel like are maybe are holding some of these leaders back?

Michelle Cox: I would say that one of the areas that I see the most is that the higher you go within an organization or and quite frankly, if you’re a business owner in itself, the that you aren’t receiving feedback, you get less and less and less feedback. And so you you lose that sense of awareness. Where do exactly do I need to work? Where do where do I need to grow and develop? What’s what is impacting my team? What’s impacting my peers? And that is a huge piece of it. You think you’re doing really good, and then all of a sudden it’s like, well, are you? Let’s kind of dig in and see, are you doing as good as you either think you’re doing or as other people are quote unquote, telling you you’re doing?

Stone Payton: Well, it’s an excellent point, because I guess many of us have heard the saying that it’s lonely at the top, but I guess the dynamics are such that just that’s just the way things are. It is lonely, at least in terms of getting candid, practical feedback that you can turn around and learn from and act on, isn’t it?

Michelle Cox: Yes it is. As an example, I spoke with an executive this morning and he’s like, yeah, I don’t really receive feedback anymore. And he he said to me, he was like, you know, I might get maybe you might want to say something like this or say something like that, but it’s not that elevated type of here’s a trend I’m seeing. This is what’s going to take you to the next level and having a different type of conversation with somebody at that level.

Stone Payton: So what is the key? And I you know, I certainly don’t expect you to try to reduce your work to a cosmopolitan article, but is is part of the key to to opening this vault up, equipping them to ask questions of the people around them in such a way and in such an environment that they will get that feedback. Or what’s the what’s the master key, you think?

Michelle Cox: Well, obviously hiring a coach like me is fantastic. Not to put not not to put a plug in there for myself now, but honestly hiring an external point of view so you’re able to get back because somebody externally is able to see the trends and see it, they’re not attached to whatever it is you’re doing. So they’re they’re the people that are going to provide you that type of honest feedback, because they have no skin in the game other than to make you successful and help you be successful. The second piece is Cases like you had said, asking powerful questions. If someone if you’re asking your team, hey, is there anything else I can do to help you if you’re stopping at that question when they say no, you’re doing great, but you need to take that question a step further. What’s one thing I can do that will truly support you in what you’re up to, whether it be your professional development goals, whether it be your, um, your personal goals, whatever that looks. What’s one thing? And usually when you’re asking that question, someone’s like, well, I could think of one thing that you can do to support me differently. So it’s starting to peel back the onion just a tad bit. And if they’re not providing you anything, keep asking, don’t wait. And don’t just look for your team or your boss. Look at your peers. Look all around you.

Stone Payton: The the first time a leader exhibits that behavior is probably. It might feel a little bit clunky, but I bet with a little bit of repetition, repetition, and with a and maintaining the discipline to make it as safe an environment as possible to have that conversation, I bet it is truly powerful and pays some real dividends.

Michelle Cox: It does, it does. And I would say that you’re you’re right. It is a little bit from an executive. When you first start having that conversation, part of it is prefacing, listen, I want you to be successful and I really want to set you up for success. And I’m not perfect. I have blind spots, just like you have blind spots, or anybody else in this world has blind spots. And so I really want to find out what my blind spots are so I can enable you. And when you make it about you, not about them, like, hey, you know, there’s that correlation. So I want to support you. And it’s also saying I’m going to have a vulnerable conversation with you. And really exposed myself to say, I’m open, I want to grow, I want to develop. And your feedback is helping me do that too.

Stone Payton: So what’s the backstory, Michelle? How did you get involved with with coaching?

Michelle Cox: You know, initially I was part of an amazing organization and they really focused on developing their leaders. Their their business model was if you take if you develop your leaders, they’re going to develop your employees. Employees are going to take care of your customers. And at the end of the day, that’s going to drive business results. So they really set up that structure where I was getting constant, constant development as a leader. And as the years went on, I was with the organization for 16 years and the initial CEO, he retired. And so when he retired, new CEO comes in, they have a new philosophy and you start seeing some of the structures start going like further and further away. So I decided to go out and find my own, let me find my own leadership development and growth. How do I help all the people I’m working with? How do I help my team the most? How do I continue to develop? And I was working with all executives inside our organization as well as outside our organization. So I found an executive coaching and leadership development. I had no intention of becoming an executive coach.

Michelle Cox: That wasn’t necessarily what I went in there for, which people always laugh at because I was like, I didn’t go in there saying, hey, I want to become a coach. And I was one of 20 people that was in that room that said, I’m not here to become a coach. I have no ambition to become a coach. And in that program, I had my own coach and I, my sister passed away three months into it and it really started shifting my perspective of how how you can support a leader, how you support somebody who is has a lot of circumstances going on, whether it be personal or professional circumstances and supporting them despite to move forward, despite what’s happening and really grow from it. And it completely shifted my perspective. And that was a turning point for me. So year in, I was coaching and I’ve been coaching for the last ten years or 11 years, actually just had my 11th anniversary and I’ve been on my own for over eight years now. So it’s it’s just kind of a marriage made in heaven here.

Stone Payton: Well, and you, you not only had to build out this practice and continue to hone your craft, but the. Oh, by the way, you got to learn how to run a business too, right?

Michelle Cox: Yeah, very much so. Very much so that that was definitely a learning curve. Definitely a learning curve for me.

Stone Payton: Was it tough in the early going getting the new work like finding the people or creating an environment where they would find you. I mean, I’m sure you’ve cracked that code in the last 11 years, but maybe in the beginning.

Michelle Cox: Uh, definitely difficult. I would say that for for me, I started building my practice while I was still in corporate, so it was in tandem. So I get them together and I because I was working with executives already, it was my niche that I hadn’t said, oh, I’m this is my niche at that point in time. But that was who I was working with. So when I was telling them what I was up to, they’re like, oh, I could really use a coach. And so it was sort of naturally being that some of the people I was working with professionally wanted to hire me for coaching and developing, and so that’s kind of where my practice was bred from and started building from there. Now, I won’t say it’s all sunshine and glory, right? It’s not all sunshine and roses. I and you know, and I’ve hired I’ve always throughout the last 11 years I’ve had my own coach, and so I’m ensuring that I’m okay. If I’m saying everybody can use a coach, I’m modeling that behavior for people I’m working with. So it and hiring another coach, like ensuring that I’m leveling up my skill set in marketing business. How do I go to sales? How do I go to market? All of those different pieces of the puzzle has really been key for me in order to grow my business.

Stone Payton: So over a decade in now, and I’m sure this has changed some over the course of you building out this practice. But what are you finding the most rewarding at this point in your career? What do you what’s the most fun about it for you these days?

Michelle Cox: Oh gosh. So my why I will say this my why behind working with executives is really clean. I want to create a trickle effect within organizations, within businesses. So if I’m working with an executive leader that what I’m teaching that person. They’re taking that and they’re pushing it down throughout their entire team, organization, what have you to their peers. And that’s my why. And that’s what drives me. And when I see an executive that’s moving forward, I see an executive that wants to get promoted. They get promoted. I see an executive that was working 80 hours a week and they’re like, Michel, I’m I’m no longer working 80 hours a week, and they’re down to a manageable time frame that they’re working. They’re taking vacations, and the other piece is taking care of themselves. I see so many executives that don’t take care of themselves and when I can, and they go hand in hand. How you take care of yourself is how you can take care of others. And ultimately, all of those pieces. Every time my client has a win, that’s a win for me.

Stone Payton: So say a little bit more about the what’s the right word? The the execution mechanism. Like how does the work take place? Is that a lot of one on one? Is there group work? Is there asynchronous work? I don’t know, maybe a little bit of all of it. Huh.

Michelle Cox: Well, I do all one on one in my coaching practice as it stands today. Uh, saying that there won’t be something different in the future. However, right now I found that there is a level of vulnerability and intimacy that comes when you are having that type of conversation with somebody, and you really want that person to open up, and you want to save space where you know that you can say whatever it is and that person’s not judging you. And that’s the environment that I create for my clients.

Stone Payton: Well, it’s incredible to me. I continue to find it fascinating. You know, we’ve been doing this coaching series for a little while now, and that does seem to be a theme of, um, creating a safe environment that is, uh, the level of trust that you have to create to, to provide for that vulnerability. Where you can really do that work is um, it strikes me that’s probably something you had developed well before you sort of went out on your on your own, but is are strategies and tactics and disciplines and those kinds of things. Is that part of why you chose to be formally credentialed and go through that, uh, that certification process.

Michelle Cox: With the International Coaching Federation?

Michelle Cox: Yeah, I wouldn’t say that. That’s the reason why, um, that I chose to get my credentials. However, for me, it was how do I ensure that I, I’m able to provide the best coaching possible and how do I continue to develop and all of those when I went out and got my credentials, you’re taking testing, you’re going through you’re having recordings evaluated. So you’re really going through a next level of development, even for yourself. And so that’s the reason why I chose to do it, is to ensure that I was able to provide my clients the best possible experience that they could have.

Stone Payton: So in the work, you know, you touched on early on when I was asking about kind of what it’s like the main thing that holds leaders back are you also, do you ever come across folks that are having a little bit of a challenge leading all these different variations in the same workplace? I certainly hear a lot about that. But is that is that real? Is that something that leaders are struggling with?

Michelle Cox: There are a lot of different variations. Yes there are. I mean, you think about there’s hybrid, there’s in-person, there’s there’s fully remote. There’s all sorts of different environments that are set up today. And so like physical location is one of the challenges, especially if you’ve never done it before. If all of a sudden you’ve been leading for the last 20 years in an environment that you’ve been face to face and now it’s 100% remote, and you would think that five years into being remote, that leaders have that skill set, but they don’t always they fall back. A lot of leaders fall back on. Well, this is what I know. And so I want my team together. I can’t get X if I don’t if I’m not in person, which or I can’t get Y, it doesn’t matter what it is. Don’t get me wrong, I love being in person. I love being able to see people in person. And I also think you can facilitate relationships. You can build a team, a cohesive team environment, even if you’re not. And so a lot of it is mindset and shifting that mindset.

Stone Payton: So you yes, you have these different environments. You’ve got another layer of this is, I’m sure, communication styles, generations. I mean, it’s a pretty it’s a Rubik’s cube. It’s not just a flat map, is it?

Michelle Cox: It is not. It is not. There are like so many different components go into being a leader, much like you said, generational leadership. Um, and a lot of that is, you know, we talk about communication, we talk about generation. And the interesting, most interesting part about it is if we think about communication or we think about generational leadership at the root of everything, it’s what type of relationship have I created with the person? How well do I know them? At what level do I know? How do they prefer to receive communication? How do they prefer to send communication? How do they prefer and really understanding who they are? What’s their what do they love that what are they passionate about and what the sooner you get to know that individual, that’s how you like. You get rid of the oh, they’re this generation or they’re that generation, and you start removing some of the the different challenges that you think that are sitting out there. They’re not really sitting out there. It’s just asking enough questions and getting underneath and building that relationship one on one with that person to know what the answers are. So you can work most effectively both ways, and it takes you to adjusting that. You can’t just say, this is how I do it, and this is the only way. As a leader, it’s your responsibility to adjust to your team as well.

Stone Payton: Okay, let’s talk about me for a minute. It’s my show.

Michelle Cox: No, sorry. I just went on and on. No, no.

Stone Payton: No, I’m saying that tongue in cheek, because as as I hear you describe this process, I’m kind of putting myself in the trying to in the shoes of a of a client. And I can see me working with you getting some tremendous insight. And then in a safe environment, being willing to take some risks, try some new things, and then and then go out and try on some of these new behaviors and then and then come back to you and, and share with you what I experienced. Um, but it also, it also strikes me as something that’s not just something I try on a Tuesday and then come back and all right, we got we checked that one off the list. Right? I mean, it’s a it’s an ongoing iterative process I’m sure.

Michelle Cox: Yeah it is, it is. And there’s multiple different practices that I’ll or actions and practices. And it’s like a layer upon layer building exercise. It’s not just a one and done. And a lot of times I will if you look at a person, how they’re doing something in their professional life, a lot of times they’re doing the same thing in their personal life.

Stone Payton: Ah.

Michelle Cox: And so when you start looking at the human combine and you really say, well, let’s just practice this in a safe environment at home. And they start getting reflections at home. They’re like, oh my gosh, I’m doing this at home. I’m doing it at work. It’s something that’s showing up everywhere. So it’s as soon as you start getting that awareness level and all of a sudden it’s like, okay, let’s practice something new and you’re able to practice in a safe environment and build that muscle and keep building it. That’s where it becomes the expertise.

Stone Payton: Well, and I’m sure just a little bit of forward progress starts to build some, some confidence and build on itself. I think that I think that’s marvelous. You just got to go in. Sounds like eyes wide open knowing that, you know, we’re not going to be hitting three pointers right out of the box here all the time.

Michelle Cox: Yeah, I mean I look at it in the fact, um, okay, what are the wins? And they may be small wins, but we actually celebrate and acknowledge the small wins along the way. So even as we have momentum here, you are saying, okay, so I’m throwing the pass to the ten yard line. I got the ten yard line. Now I’m throwing it to the 20 yard line. I’m getting there too. And so when you hit the touchdown, it’s that a much larger celebration. But you’re seeing your progress every step of the journey.

Stone Payton: And I absolutely do not want to dismiss this idea of, um, I guess my phrase for it back in the day was capability transfer. But you mentioned a ripple effect or the trickle down effect, if you can have that kind of impact with me as a leader of a, you know, reasonably successful media company. But then I go, you’re not just helping me if I’m engaging in those behaviors, exercising those disciplines. There really is an ongoing, uh, continuous effect throughout the organization, right?

Michelle Cox: There is. And even if you think about the next generation, the next level of leaders that’s coming up. If you if you’re an executive and you’re you have a team underneath you and you’re coaching your directors and then you’re coaching your that directors, coaching their managers and so on and so on and so on. Ultimately, every step that that that person will take, they’re going to take what they learned and take it to the next level that they go take it to the next organization that they go. And so it really does cause that ripple effect.

Stone Payton: So hobbies, interests, pursuits, passions outside the the scope of your work. Anything you nerd out about that’s not this.

Michelle Cox: Uh, well, yes. I mean, I’m a runner, so that is definitely, you know, and people think, oh, that’s exercise. But for me, that’s like my that is like my little, like meditation. That’s my place that I love getting outside. I love being able to I live right on the river here in Milwaukee. That is a big one. I golf, I golf, albeit it’s it’s awful golf but I love it. I mean nobody’s going to want to be I feel bad for the people behind me. It’s not a pretty pretty sport for me. But I love it. I love the peacefulness. I love the quietness. I love the guess what? It’s it’s not about anybody that I’m I’m having to rely on. It’s just kind of a place that I can just go and be, and I don’t have to do anything else and just enjoy it.

Stone Payton: Oh, I am so glad that I asked. I, I asked a gentleman the other day on the air and and we found out he played the bagpipes. You just never know what you learn about somebody when you ask him about that.

Michelle Cox: That’s amazing.

Michelle Cox: My uncle is a big pipes and I’m always like, wow, that’s that’s impressive. It really is.

Stone Payton: But you know, you touched on taking care of your self and to my way of thinking, you engaging in these activities outside the scope of your work is an expression of taking care of yourself. And I guess my personal experience has been, and maybe you would echo this. I really think for me, hunting and fishing and traveling and boating, when I go out and do that, I honestly feel like if I give myself that space, I feel like I come back a better practitioner and better equipped to serve my clients.

Michelle Cox: Absolutely, 100%. And I think that there is a misconception of that, like, oh, I have to push forward. I have to push through, I have to work. If I don’t work, then I’m going to come back and there’s going to be a million things that I’m going to have to take care of. But the thing is, sometimes you have to slow down to speed up.

Stone Payton: So what would you characterize as, um, signals for someone to what would they be seeing, hearing, experiencing where they ought to take a step back and say, hey, maybe I really ought to explore this idea of engaging a coach. Are there some some, like, telltale signs or. Yeah. Hit the brakes a minute and at least consider having a conversation with somebody like you.

Michelle Cox: Yeah, I would say this.If you have if you if you’re getting passed over for promotions, that’s the time to say, oh, shoot, I might have something that I actually need to work on. And that’s where I need to go out and see if there’s somebody that can support me and see if there’s some blind spots that I have, or if you’re losing passion behind what you’re doing and how you’re doing it. Go out and find a coach. There’s a reason why you’re losing your passion behind it. It may be that what you valued ten years, 20 years ago isn’t the same thing that you value today. And what your aspirations are look different, so explore that. And the third thing I would say, if you’re working a crazy amount of hours, if you if you find that you’re not able to depend on your team. If you find that your results aren’t where you want them to be, and you find that you’re doing a lot of the work, and your team isn’t like you’re doing the work of your team, that is also a red flag. Go hire a coach. Let them help you through that process of it.

Stone Payton: Michelle, what’s the best way for our listeners to continue to tap into your work? Maybe have a more substantive conversation with you or somebody on your team. Let’s leave them with some coordinates.

Michelle Cox: Yeah, absolutely. If they anybody can go to my website. Michelle L cox.com. And they can book a call with me. See more nuggets that come out. Linkedin is an amazing place to come out there. I post pretty regularly that a lot of thought leadership different articles. So another good place. And again you can find me to book a call there too.

Stone Payton: What a delightful conversation Michelle, I find you so engaging. I find your perspective inspiring and it makes me want to kind of reflect on my own leadership, which hey, look gang, if you want to get a little bit of free insight and wisdom, get yourself a radio show. You can talk to some really smart people. But this is I have thoroughly enjoyed the conversation. You’re clearly doing important work and we sure appreciate you.

Michelle Cox: Thank you so much. This is amazing. I think you’re doing a very important work as well. So it’s right back at you.

Stone Payton: Thank you. Alright, until next time. This is Stone Payton for our guest today, Michelle Cox and everyone here at the Business RadioX family saying we’ll see you in the fast lane.

Intro: Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX studios in Atlanta, Georgia. It’s time for High Velocity Radio.

Stone Payton: Welcome to the High Velocity Radio show, where we celebrate top performers producing better results in less time. Stone Payton here with you this morning. You guys are in for a real treat. Please join me in welcoming to the broadcast with Signature Leadership, LLC, Alicia Thompson. How are you?

Alicia Thompson: I’m great. Nice to be here.

Stone Payton: Oh, it’s a delight to have you in studio. I got a ton of questions, Alicia. We may not get to them all, but then again, maybe we will. But let’s start with the mission. Purpose? What? What are you really out there trying to do for folks?

Alicia Thompson: I am trying to help people hold on to their mojo and figure out how to be excellent leaders. We all want to work for great people. Why not be one yourself? So that’s my goal.

Stone Payton: I love that. I feel the mojo. I like that. So how’d you get into this line of work? Because you weren’t always doing this. You’ve got a pretty star studded corporate career before this. Yeah.

Alicia Thompson: Yeah. I spent 30 years in corporate America. And to that statement I just made, I worked for some great leaders, some not so great leaders, and I decided that there was just a tug on my heart to help people be the best leader they could be, and to enjoy their work, because we have too many years to work to not enjoy it. So I, with a layoff, decided this was the perfect time to pivot my career and start helping people be the leaders that they wanted to be.

Stone Payton: So what was that transition like? I mean, it had to be a little bit intimidating to go from the corporate arena to hanging your shingle out and becoming a practitioner. But, I mean, you’re also you’re running a Business, right?

Alicia Thompson: Yeah. It was scary to know that the only paycheck coming in was going to be based on my effort and my hard work, but I just felt a calling to do it. And now that I am doing it, I love it. Even with the stress of running a business and being solely responsible for clients engagement. I love it. It jazzes me. I got my mojo.

Stone Payton: Well, let’s dive into the work a little bit. Tell us a little bit about the mechanism for the work, who you’re working with, that kind of thing. Yeah.

Alicia Thompson: So I am working with both emerging leaders, people who are starting to transition from being an independent contributor to managing people. But I also work with senior leaders who are trying to navigate this changing world of work. The world of work has changed significantly with technology advances, the rise of AI. The pandemic changed people’s mindsets. We have Millennials and Gen Xers in the marketplace now. So you’re working with multigenerational workforces and the contract. I believe the contract between employees and employers has changed coming out of the pandemic, the power shifted to the employee, but now we’re at a place where it’s starting to swing back the other way. So how do you constantly navigate all of these changes? So I really focus on helping established leaders navigate all of the change.

Stone Payton: So when you at least initially are working with these folks, do you find that sometimes they’re feeling a little overwhelmed with all this change?

Alicia Thompson: They are feeling overwhelmed and a lot of them are established leaders, as I said. So they don’t know how to change, right? They don’t may not want to change, but they realize they need to. So they work with a coach who helps them see their hidden Achilles heels, helps them drive some awareness and some self-awareness about how they are showing up in the market, in, in the workforce, and then shifts their mindset so that they start to embrace the growth that is required for long term sustainability in a leadership role.

Stone Payton: So are you finding that these opportunities to to serve are being sponsored by the organization, or is it individuals coming to you to invest in their own future? A little bit of both. It’s a little.

Alicia Thompson: Bit of both. I’d say 50% of my clients are self-pay. Yeah. And 50% of them, their companies have seen them as high performance opportunities and are investing in their growth and their leadership because they see them as valuable assets to the company.

Stone Payton: So the work of a coach, in your experience, and I’m sure it differs from case to case and maybe from coach to coach, do you find that on the continuum? It leans a little more toward drawing answers out or helping people sort of, uh, uh, find their own answers or more to hey, this is what you need to do. Boom boom boom. What’s what’s your experience been?

Alicia Thompson: So the latter is mentoring. This is one of the things I learned in my coaching program okay. The latter is mentoring. You’re giving advice, you’re driving insights. But real core coaching is around asking really great questions that make the client go, oh, that’s what that is. Or you make them challenge the point of view or the perspective that they came into it with their steadfast in their opinion and their point of view. And you ask them questions to help pull back the layers to say, is that really true, or are you is that a perception you have or an assumption you have and you make them start to really question, is that what is that reality? And then they can get to the answer. The answer was already in them. Sometimes they block it, Sometimes they know it, but they’ve chosen to ignore it. It’s a mixed bag.

Stone Payton: So you had role models who were really good leaders, and you’ve had the street cred of of that experience. Did you also choose to go pursue any formally credentialed training kind of stuff to really get get good at asking these questions?

Alicia Thompson: I did I had the the amazing benefit of attending or participating in the Emory University Executive Education Coaching program, and that is where I had my aha moment. I think it’s what they told us on first day was you’re not giving advice. You’re asking questions to help uncover their self-awareness. And I was like, oh, I’ve been I’ve been mentoring for 20 years, and now you’re telling me I got to shift my mindset? Um, so I did. I went through a program because it’s not required, but it is certainly endorsed that you have a international coaching federation, ICF. Oh yeah. Accreditation or credential. And so many of us are going through that process or have been through the process. There are several levels of it, but I think I was in a class of 35 or 40. So there’s a lot of coaches out there. There’s a lot of competition.

Stone Payton: So do you see, I’m sure every case has got to be unique in so many ways. But do you see patterns evolve when especially early in the work and you walk into this think, okay, I’ve seen this before, so I’m going to ask this set of questions. Are there some common patterns? I guess I would ask?

Alicia Thompson: There are definitely some common challenges that people face. So imposter syndrome is one. And a lot of people like liken imposter syndrome to only women. But I can’t tell you how many of my male clients have imposter syndrome as well. And it’s just a it’s a question of do I really did I really earn this seat at the table? And is anyone in the room going to figure out that I don’t know what the heck I’m doing, but I’m faking it till I make it. And so there are certain questions that you ask because you want to understand where that sense of not being entitled to be in the room comes from. And a lot of it we can trace back to childhood and roles in the family and behaviors of the family dynamic and the family unit. And so there’s some key questions you can ask to start to help the person go, oh, like, look at my resume. I, I have accomplished amazing things and I can be in this room. So imposter syndrome is one. I think the second one that I come across a lot is people who question or challenge their capability to lead people. They understand that they probably got promoted because they were a great individual contributor. But companies don’t train people how to be managers. That’s how you end up with bad leaders, because you don’t train them to be lead people. But all of a sudden you give them a promotion and give them a team. They go have at it. They’ve never done a performance review, they don’t know how to give feedback effectively. But that’s what teams need. They need good feedback. They need someone that can have empathy, somebody that is authentic, someone that can coach them. But we don’t train people to do that. So they’re flying by the seat of their pants.

Stone Payton: And I’m sitting here trying to envision the level of trust that you must have to engender with these folks before you can really make any substantive cover, any substantive ground on these topics. So you must do some things right out of the box that really establish that trust and give them the the latitude to be, I don’t know, a little bit vulnerable or at least honest.

Alicia Thompson: Yeah, And I do initiate the engagements with a chemistry check call, because if they don’t send something in you that allows them to get to that vulnerable place. Yeah. Then the coaching engagement is never going to go anywhere. So I have an hour and a half call with them where we really just talk, just human to human. And if we can find some connectivity, then I do. I, I simply ask, I need in order for this to work, in order for the investment to be worth the spend for you or your company, you’ve got to lay it all on the table, or we’re just doing catch up calls and chatting about kids and all that kind of stuff. So I asked for their vulnerability, I asked for their honesty, and I commit to being the same on my side. And you probably you can probably establish a good trust if you do a six minute, six month engagement by the end of month one, you know if it’s going to be a good relationship. And if they are being vulnerable and they need some small wins. I always try to give them some small wins in that first month so that they go, oh, this is working okay. I can I can open up even more because she gets it. She’s asking me the things I need to do, and she’s helping me understand the shifts I need to make.

Stone Payton: So you’re a good five years plus in the coaching arena.

Alicia Thompson: I started my company five years ago after one layoff, and then I got chicken and it was like, oh no, I can’t do this. And so I went and got another corporate gig. But I kept my company. Yeah, kept paying my doing my annual registration with the Georgia, you know, office of whatever. Um, and then this year I started my coaching program in January of 2024, you have to coach to get your ICF credential. You have to have a certain number of hours. So I started coaching then and just added that to what I had been doing five years ago and here I am.

Stone Payton: So what are you finding the most rewarding about the work at this point in your career? What’s the most fun about it for you?

Alicia Thompson: You know, seeing people have that aha moment right where you’re talking to them. And I do have clients across the country. Um, and so some of them are in zoom, on zoom, some of them are in person, but when they go, oh my gosh, we talked about that last week and a situation came up at the office and I tried a different approach that we had talked about, and it worked like, well, of course it worked because we talked about, you know, you have to try new things. I also just had a second client come back. We coached early on, right. Finished that six month engagement. We talked on Friday. She says I want to come back for another six months. I’ve got a new struggle that I’m going through. And I was like, well, I must have been doing something right. If you’ve come back a second time, a second bite at the apple.

Stone Payton: So is having an accountability partner part of the equation, or is that a different thing altogether?

Alicia Thompson: No, and that’s exactly what my client that just came back said. She said, I’ve got to make some shifts, but I need an accountability partner. I need somebody that’s going to hold my feet to the fire. Somebody that’s going to be honest with me and not just say, yeah, yeah, yeah, and be a cheerleader. I need somebody that’s going to call me out on my stuff and make sure that I’m doing what I commit to do. And so being an accountability partner is important because what happens is as you move up the chain in a company, you become more senior. Who’s going to hold you accountable. Mhm. The likelihood that your people that report to you are going to call you out on stuff is slim to nil. So you, you don’t happen. And I worked for a CEO once and she said it’s lonely at the top. You don’t know who your friends are. You don’t know who to trust. When you become a CEO and your peer set gets smaller. Yeah.

Stone Payton: So speak a little bit to this idea of leadership presence.

Alicia Thompson: Mhm. Yeah. So I think leadership presence is really important, especially as you become more senior. And there’s kind of a couple of components that I think weave into that authenticity. I can’t tell you how important authenticity is. People need to know what they’re getting any given day and consistently so authentically being yourself because it’s too hard and takes too much energy to try to be something that you’re not. The second thing I say is empathy. Especially in this changing world of work. You’ve got people who are working remote people that are being called back to the office that may not be fitting their new lifestyle. So you’re having some angst there. So empathy is an important thing. Being a lifelong learner is. A third thing is you’ve got to constantly want to grow and improve and be better. You can’t just assume because you are now sitting at the top of the pinnacle, that you’ve achieved everything you’re going to achieve, and you’re the smartest person in the room. And then I’d say, finally, being someone who is committed to their own growth and growing other people.

Stone Payton: So you mentioned you touched on mentors and mentoring. I know the answer to this question has got to be yes. So but I’ll ask anyway so we can talk about it. Uh, it sounds like you have had the benefit of one or more mentors along the way to help you navigate new terrain up to and including the the coaching profession. Yeah.

Alicia Thompson: Yeah. I have had and continue to have amazing mentors. I like to call them my board of directors, and I think everyone should have a board of directors, and it should be a diverse group of men, women, all ethnicities, people who are in your industry, people that are not in your industry, just pure business people. But you can learn something from every one of them. And over the course of your career you will come across challenges where you will have to tap different skill sets. So why not have a group of people on deck that will take your call immediately and help you out? And so that’s what my board of directors is. And there are some amazing mentors, some I talk to every week, some I talk to once a year. I literally just reached out to two of them over the weekend and on LinkedIn, and they responded. And I haven’t talked to one of them in three and a half years. But she responded like that and she said, sure, I’m happy to help you.

Stone Payton: So so what are some signals that someone might look for that would indicate, hey, maybe it really is time for me to reach out and consider engaging a coach.

Alicia Thompson: Yeah, I’d say first you’re feeling stuck. That Mojo has left the room and you’re feeling like something’s missing. You’re not getting the same level of enjoyment out of your work, so definitely You’re feeling stuck. I’d say the second is you’re navigating a big change, either a layoff or organizational changes. You have a new leader. You’ve got a new CEO coming in. You’re not quite sure how that’s going to all work together. So you’re navigating some changes. Your leadership impact feels like it’s not landing the way it should. Like you’re if you like managing a high performing team, but they’re not really performing on the high level right now, you may want to take a step back and say, what more can I do? Or what more should I be doing in order to make help them perform at their highest level? Um, you’re struggling with the work life integration. Like I said, a lot of companies are making people go back to work, but we’ve been home for years learning how to take a call, do laundry, prep dinner, all that stuff. So the flexibility is gone and you’re trying to figure out how you’re going to integrate your work in life again, may need a coach to help you out with that. And finally, I’d say you’re just ready to up your game. You’re ready to be a better version of yourself, and that’s where a coach comes in.

Stone Payton: So what’s the best way to go get one? Because it because it seems overwhelming to me. And and I am doing a series right now, obviously interviewing very well-established coaches to get some insight in this arena. And, and so I feel like I’ve got the inside track, but even I don’t even know where to start to like, go get one.

Alicia Thompson: Yeah, I would say vulnerability for sure. And talking to people say, I’m looking for a coach, you know, this is what I’m doing right now and this is how I would love to have some support, a thought partner. Do you know any coaches? Because the best referrals come from people who know you, right. And so they have a sense of who you are and what makes you tick. So they can they would more likely pair you with somebody that they think has some commonalities with you. You could go on the International Coaching Federation site. You can find a coach on the site. There’s a find a coach function so you can go there. Um, and then I would say, you know, those probably are the two best routes. I think somebody giving you a referral and then going on the ICF, um, website and just finding a coach and, and vetting them, you know, having a couple most coaches will do a chemistry call, 30 minute call just to talk to you, see what it is you want to work on, tell you if it’s something they have a specialty in. Even though I said a few minutes ago, there’s a big competitive space for coaches. There’s a lot of us out there. We also are very much a community. I have found that coaching is very deep, interconnected community, and we will refer each other to someone if we if I meet someone and I don’t think I’m just the right fit or I don’t have a specialty in the area they’re looking for. Well, I’ve got 35 cohorts that went through my Emory program with me, and I know them all well enough that I could say, you know what? I think Chris would be better for you, right?

Stone Payton: So. So no doubt Chris would ask me great questions. What questions should I be asking? Chris?

Alicia Thompson: Right. You should be asking your coach about their experience and their life experiences right there. What things got them or led them to this place, what work experiences they have that you might be able to find some parallels, what experiences they’ve had to find out, if there’s some parallels of things they’ve lived through themselves. You should ask about their credentials. You know, I’ve gone through it, so I want everybody to have theirs, that you should ask them about their credentials. You should ask them about their training. You should ask them about some of their clients, like what does their client mix look like. And because that also can weigh in on their availability and their capacity to take on new clients. Yeah.

Stone Payton: So so on the business side of coaching, we said this earlier, you know, you you continue to hone your craft and become a better and better practitioner. And oh, by the way, you got a you got to run this business, you got to go get the business. And this likely isn’t the case now, I suspect. But early on, was it a bit of a challenge, like getting the work? Like how does the whole sales and marketing thing work for a coach, or how does it work for you anyway?

Alicia Thompson: Well, I think it varies by person, by coach for me, because I had 30 plus years in the Atlanta business community, I didn’t have that big of an issue getting my first suite of clients because they were like, oh my God, you’re coaching. Thank God you could use you, I could hire you. And then I had the opportunity to speak on a couple of panels, and in speaking at those panels, people would come up and say, I got somebody I want to refer you to. I think you’d be a great match for her or him. And then now I am getting into that phase where it’s like, oh my God, how do I market this? How do I do this? So that’s why I’m reaching out to some of my mentors who have been in the business world much longer than I have been in sales roles. That’s why you have a diverse board of directors. Um, and so I’m doing that. I’m doing shows like this. I do weekly blogs, so hopefully and put them on LinkedIn. So hopefully something that I talk about will inspire someone to say, hey, I want to have a conversation. I have a website so people can find me through the website. You know, it’s just marketing is different for everyone because not everybody is comfortable being on a radio show. Or sometimes people don’t like to write, so they don’t want to do a blog. I’m trying a mixture of different things right now, just to kind of see what resonates the most with clients and then existing clients. I’m asking them for referrals.

Stone Payton: So has anyone suggested that you write a book?

Alicia Thompson: Everybody has suggested I write a book. Everybody has suggested I write a book. Um, and it’s so funny. My brother is seven years younger than me and he’s writing a book. He’s a college professor, And he’s like, no, you cannot write a book because I know you. You’ll get it done before I get mine done. And I’m like, yeah, probably so, but that’s okay. Um, yeah, people have said that. But when I, when I write a book and I will write one at some point, I want to make sure that it’s something that’s really, really powerfully useful to people. I don’t just want to write a book on a topic du jour. I want to write a topic on a topic that has some staying power, and something that people will continue to be faced with over the course of their career for a long time to come.

Stone Payton: So here’s a pro tip from me. Okay. That I did not follow because my writing a book preceded me being involved in this line of work 20 plus years ago. But if I were to write another one and I might, I think I’m going to sit down and talk it and get it transcribed. Maybe start with some prompts or something, maybe get it transcribed and hand it to a real writer and, you know, and get it cleaned up. So it’s just an idea and it’s it’s a good idea. It’s not something you have to come into a formal studio like this. I mean, you know, there’s equipment now you could set up at the house and. Yeah, and knock it out. Just an idea, because.

Alicia Thompson: That’s a great idea.

Stone Payton: I might do that on the next one.

Alicia Thompson: I think that’s a great idea, and I would think it would be easier. I could tell my brother that because he can talk in wax poetic for hours, but it seems like he’s struggling with typing it out so well.

Stone Payton: For whatever it’s worth for your brother, I found that some of the chapters came together incredibly easy, and others, you know, just I got blank paper staring back at me. Or digital screen really at this point even back then. But I don’t know. We’ll see. But I think that might be a good way to. I think that’s a great idea.

Alicia Thompson: I think that’s a huge, hugely helpful approach. I’m going to make a mental note of that.

Stone Payton: So I’m going to switch gears on you here for a minute outside the scope of your coaching work. Uh, passions, pursuits, hobbies, interests, anything you nerd out about, uh, when, when you’re not doing this. This kind of work?

Alicia Thompson: Yeah. So I’m a huge foodie, so any restaurant, any I follow Eater Atlanta. New restaurants. I’m ready to check them out. Um, I’m in part of a wonderful food group called The Tasting Collective, where they go to a different up and coming not not always up and coming. Some of them have already arrived, but they’re typically independent restaurants, so they’re not chained. Right. And so you’re going in and you’re meeting the chefs. They’re coming out and they’re talking to the diners. It’s amazing. Um, so I love food. Will travel for food. I’ve been to Madrid. I’ve been, you know, like if there’s a food trip, I’m. I’m on board. Um, I love to travel. We’re we’re planning our Christmas trip this year. We’re going to Costa Rica again. Again, because my nieces love Costa Rica. So we’re going back again to see more sloths. Um, so I love to travel and family and friends. Right now that I’m not working in corporate, I have more flexibility with my time. My mom’s moved to Atlanta, so I get the chance to spend time with her. My brother lives in Colorado, so I don’t go out there during the snow time. I won’t get back out there until probably June because they get snow.

Stone Payton: But it’s beautiful in June, it’s.

Alicia Thompson: Beautiful in June. It’s one of the most beautiful cities you’ve ever been to. It’s clean, it’s nice, fresh air. It’s great. Um, and then I think my other passion is I am an adult. Colorer. Right, I love I have a million coloring books, every pen, pencil color you could think of. And I color art pieces all the time. I even now do them on my iPad. They’ve got these things where you can touch. My mom goes, if you send me one more picture, I’m going to scream. Um, but I like things that occupy my mind other than business, right? You need to step away from business and just let your creativity flow. Allows me to be a better coach.

Stone Payton: I think it’s interesting that you say that I’m of the same mind, and my listeners know that I like to hunt, fish and travel and I do a lot of stuff outdoors, but I, I genuinely believe maybe I’m just telling myself this, but I genuinely believe if I give myself a that white space, I call it, I feel like I come back that much better equipped to serve. That’s your experience as well?

Alicia Thompson: That is my experience when you just let your mind focus on something else that again, that creativity, you just get to be you. You come back when it’s time to plug back in to work. I find that I’m much more relaxed. My head is clearer, I better questions come up. Um, yeah. It’s so much better. It’s good for me personally and it makes me a better coach.

Stone Payton: So what’s next for you professionally? Are we going to are we going to have the Alicia method documented and published, or are we going to are we going to continue to expand, going to stay on the same track? What do you think?

Alicia Thompson: I think for now, I my expansion is going to be from 1 to 1 coaching to doing more group coaching and leadership development coaching in companies. Um, so that’ll be like my next step. And then eventually, you know, maybe a book maybe. I don’t know, the world is my oyster right now. And I am just living life and loving it. And so I’m not saying no to any opportunity if it fits with and gives me an opportunity to talk to people and tout the benefits of coaching, that’s what I’m doing.

Stone Payton: Well, I hope you’ll invite us to continue to follow your story.

Alicia Thompson: Absolutely, absolutely.

Stone Payton: Before we wrap, let’s leave our listeners, if we could, with a a pro tip for producing better results and less time. Let’s lay a little wisdom on them. And look, gang, my number one pro tip for you is reach out and have a conversation with Alicia. Uh, but between now and then, let’s leave them with a little something.

Alicia Thompson: So I think my pro tip for being productive and being an amazing leader and team leader would be to listen. Listening effectively goes a very long way. When you listen to respond, you miss 50% or more of the message or the communication that the message that was being delivered. If you listen to hear, you end up coming up with better ideas, a shared idea that everybody’s already bought into because you build on each other. And that better idea typically drives better productivity, because you’ve come up with a solution that you couldn’t have done individually would not have been as effective individually, but collaboratively. It’s going to do gangbusters. And it’s all because you listened.

Stone Payton: What a marvelous piece of counsel. I’m so glad that I asked. Yeah, it has been an absolute delight having you in the studio this morning. Thank you for your enthusiasm, your insight, your perspective. And, uh, you’re clearly out there doing fantastic work for some folks that can, in turn have a tremendous impact on on so many. Thank you.

Alicia Thompson: Thank you. This was a great, great conversation. So much. So really enjoyed this. And um, yeah, be a good leader.

Stone Payton: Well, this has been my distinct pleasure. All right. Until next time. This is Stone Payton for our guest today, Alicia Thompson with Signature Leadership, LLC. And everyone here at the Business RadioX family saying, we’ll see you in the fast lane.