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BRX Pro Tip: Focus on Their Why

April 6, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton: Welcome back to Business RadioX Pro Tips. Lee Kantor, Stone Payton here with you. Lee, I know that you and I talk a lot about the why behind the work that people do, and I personally have experienced that there is some wisdom in being able to clearly, concisely communicate that. But there are some things to beware – there’s some reasons to kind of beware of the why, too, in those conversations, isn’t there?

Lee Kantor: Right. Because the why you’re doing something isn’t really the reason why a customer is going to buy from you. So, a lot of times, the founder is kind of getting to the heart of the why, why does their company exist, why was this product created, and why that idea is so important to them? But the customers don’t buy your why; they buy their why. So, you’ve got to be able to translate your why into their why. Because your users aren’t asking why did this company start? They don’t care. They’re asking, “Why should I care about this company? What’s in it for me? What problem does this solve for me? What gets easier, faster, cheaper, or better in my life because this product or service exists?”

Lee Kantor: Great businesses flip the perspective. Instead of telling the story of the company, they tell the story of the user. They show the before and the after. They show the frustration that existed before and the relief that happens once the product or service shows up.

Lee Kantor: So, here’s the pro tip: if your messaging starts with your why, you’ve lost. Start with their problem. Start what’s in it for them. Show them the outcome they desire. Make them the hero of the story. That’s when people will start paying attention to you and buying what you’re selling.

BRX Pro Tip: If I Would, Would You?

April 3, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton : Welcome back to Business RadioX Pro Tips. Stone Payton, Lee Kantor here with you. Lee, you’ve got a phrase that you feel like has some real promise and some real application in the context of a sales conversation. Lay it on us.

Lee Kantor: Yeah, this is a – I sat there. I forgot the blogger who wrote this, but I thought it was a pretty clever question you can ask in sales: if I would, would you?

Lee Kantor: This is how it works. When a prospect raises an objection, whether it’s price, timing, features, whatever they are, most people try to defend it, they try to explain it, they try to negotiate kind of blindly around it. But instead of doing that, turn the conversation into a commitment. You simply ask, if I could solve that issue, would you move forward? Or if I could get that delivered by next week, would you be ready to move ahead?

Lee Kantor: It’s this if I would do this, would you do that? So, are there places in your conversation if you can move into a simple kind of if I would, would you kind of oral contract with your prospect? So, if I could get the monthly price closer to your budget, would that make this a yes for you?

Lee Kantor: What this does is it isolates kind of the real objection. It tells you whether the issue they raise is really and actually a barrier or is that just kind of a delay tactic or a way they’re just trying to kind of say no but not hurt your feelings. But if they do say yes, now you know exactly what needs to happen to close the deal.

Lee Kantor: It’s a simple question. It brings clarity a lot faster instead of kind of trying to guess what their problem is. Just kind of if I would do this, would you do that?

BRX Pro Tip: Offense and Defence in Building Habits

April 2, 2026 by angishields

BRX Pro Tip: Retire to Something

April 1, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton: And we’re back with Business RadioX Pro Tips. Stone Payton, Lee Kantor here with you. Lee, let’s talk a little bit about mindset and approach to this whole business of retiring.

Lee Kantor: Yeah, I think that, you know, as we’re getting towards the end of our career and closer to the end than the beginning, then people have to kind of think about retirement in different ways than maybe they thought about it in the past. And a lot of times, people are thinking as their career is winding down that, okay, now I’m going to be at the beach or I’m going to be fishing all day.

Lee Kantor: And it’s really hard to retire to nothing instead of having some sort of a plan of what are you going to do in this next act of your life and retire towards something. So, you don’t want to kind of have that mentality of this is an end. It’s more of a transition to something new rather than kind of an end.

Lee Kantor: So, one of the biggest mistakes people make is that they spend their entire career focusing on, I’m going to get rid of the long hours, I’m getting rid of the stress, I’m getting rid of the commute. And that’s all you have is all these things that you got rid of. But in essence, you can start kind of aiming towards something if otherwise your retirement feels empty, and a lot of folks really kind of lose themselves and their identity when they retire, and there’s nothing for them. So, look for something. As you’re winding down, look for something you want to do.

Lee Kantor: What is a new purpose? What’s a new mission? It’s so much better to retire towards something rather than from something. So maybe you want to mentor young professionals. Maybe you want to volunteer. Maybe you want to open a Business RadioX studio in your town.

Lee Kantor: Work in the past has given you structure. Retirement can give you freedom, but you have to kind of make choices and do something – you have to fill every day. Every day has 24 hours. Every day you have to do something. And it’s one of those things where you think, I’m going to play golf every day. It’s like eating cake. Like, eating cake is fun. But if you’re eating cake at every meal, you’re going to get sick of it. And you don’t want to get sick of the things that you love.

Lee Kantor: So, freedom can give you a direction, but you have to kind of have some purpose. There has to be some meaning if you want to have a retirement that is filled with kind of a mission or a purpose. And the people who thrive in retirement aren’t the ones who stop working. They’re the ones who stepped into a new chapter with intention.

Lee Kantor: So, as you plan for retirement, don’t ask, “What did I leave behind?” Ask, “What do I want to wake up excited to do every day now?”

Scaling in Public Tip: Asking the Question

March 31, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton: Welcome back to Business RadioX Pro Tips. Stone Payton, Lee Kantor here with you. Lee, in our Scaling in Public session with Gabrielle Baumeyer, I got to tell you, it just hit me like a ton of bricks when she really got us, and particularly me, focused not on just asking questions but making sure you ask the question.

Lee Kantor: Yeah. I don’t know if it’s a coincidence, but a lot of these coaches are sales – they’re asking us sales questions. I don’t know what Trisha’s trying to tell us. But from Gabrielle, she said something that was like an obvious aha thing. She’s like, “Just ask the question, ‘Do you want to do this?'” Just stop avoiding that question. Just ask the question and shut up like that. Shutting up was an important component of that as well.

Lee Kantor: And she said a lot of people avoid this moment in sales. They keep explaining after they’ve asked the question. They don’t give the prospect time to answer the question. They keep presenting. They keep adding more information because they’re uncomfortable, because they’re afraid of hearing the answer.

Lee Kantor: Avoiding the ask is really just avoiding the truth. At some point in every sales conversation, you need clarity. Either it’s a yes or it’s a no. Both are useful. A yes moves the deal forward, and a no frees up your time to focus on the next right opportunity. So don’t dance around the decision. Ask directly. Do you want this? Get the yes or get the no.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Protecting Your Legacy—Why Estate Planning Matters More Than You Think

March 30, 2026 by angishields

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Carrie-Kemper-AllenToday’s guest is Carrie Kemper Allen, estate planning and probate attorney and founder of the Law Office of Carrie Kemper Allen.

Carrie has been serving families in the Houston and Pearland area for more than 20 years, helping them navigate estate planning, wills, and probate with both expertise and compassion. With a background in business and finance from Texas A&M and a law degree from South Texas College of Law, she brings a practical, real-world approach to protecting what matters most.

I’ve actually had the privilege of working alongside Carrie since 2020, and what sets her apart is how she shows up for her clients—often meeting them in their homes, creating a space that feels comfortable and supportive during what can be very emotional conversations.

She’s deeply rooted in family, community, and service—and truly cares about helping people create peace of mind for themselves and their loved ones.

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lawofficecarrieallen/
Website: https://www.ckallenlaw.com/

Transcript-iconThis transcript is machine transcribed by Sonix

 

TRANSCRIPT

Intro: Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX Studios in Houston, Texas. It’s time for Houston Business Radio. Now, here’s your host.

Trisha Stetzel: Hello, Houston Trisha Stetzel here bringing you another episode of Houston Business Radio is my pleasure to introduce you to today’s guest, Carrie Kemper Allen, estate planning and probate attorney and founder of the Law Office of Carrie Kemper Allen. Carrie has been serving families in the Houston and Pearland area for more than 20 years, helping them navigate estate planning, wills, and probate with both expertise and compassion. With a background in business and finance from Texas A&M and a law degree from South Texas College of Law, she brings a practical, real world approach to protecting what matters most. I’ve actually had the privilege of working alongside Carrie since 2020, and what sets her apart is how she shows up for her clients, often meeting them where they’re at, creating a space that feels comfortable and supportive during what can be a very emotional conversation. She’s deeply rooted in family, community, and service, and truly cares about helping people create peace of mind for themselves and their loved ones. Carrie, welcome to the show.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Thanks, Trisha. I’m excited to be here today.

Trisha Stetzel: I’m excited to have you on. I know sometimes it’s a little overwhelming to hear all of those beautiful things about yourself, but I wanted to make sure that people knew really who you were from where, um, where I’m coming from. And I’d love for you to tell us a little bit more about you, Carrie.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Sure. Yeah. So, um, I’m a mom. I have, uh, two boys. One of them is 20 and one of them is 17. He’s graduating from high school this year. Uh, I’ve been married for 26 years. Coming up soon. Um, I love dogs. Um, I love to travel. Um, you know that, um, and, um, I, I like my job. You know, I like what I do. It’s not always the thing people want to talk about. It’s not always the time in their life that they’re excited about, but like, it’s a good fit for me. Like, I like to be the supporter and it’s a good fit for me. So I think it’s a good I like it.

Trisha Stetzel: Yeah, I love that. Uh, and she adopts dogs or, uh, fosters dogs. Yeah, I do, I do.

Carrie Kemper Allen: I currently have a foster dog who’s been with us for a long time. So she’s part of the family for a while.

Trisha Stetzel: Well, and as long as you continue to call it a foster, it’s not failed. It’s not failed. That is correct. Still a foster.

Carrie Kemper Allen: And the dog trainer does say that our other dog has adopted her, not us. So technically, she is not a foster fail.

Trisha Stetzel: Okay, so that feels so much better. It really does.

Carrie Kemper Allen: It does.

Trisha Stetzel: Okay, so let’s start with the basics. Um, some people probably have their own idea of what estate planning means and what probate means. So let’s start with estate planning. Give us a little summary of what does it mean when you think about estate planning or when you engage with clients for estate planning?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Sure. So the biggest misnomer that I get from people is, well, I don’t have an estate because I don’t have a lot of money. Um, and that’s just not true. Everyone has an estate. If you own a home, if you have a car, if you have a bank account without a beneficiary on it. If you have a child. Um, everybody has well, not everybody, but most people have something in that category, right? So most people have an estate of some kind. Um, maybe you have a life insurance policy through your office or, um, you know, you’ve inherited something from, you know, a parent or a family member that’s part of your estate. And most people don’t consider those things because they hear estate and they think, oh, big picture. I have to have a lot of money to have an estate. And that’s just not true.

Trisha Stetzel: Okay. So that’s very helpful. Um, as parents, should we be thinking about that? I know when our kids are younger, obviously we need to be thinking about that. What if we have grown children, children, kids that are turning 18 or even older?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Yeah, absolutely. That’s been a huge thing. Um, in the last, I would say five years. Um, and when, with, with all the HIPAA regulations and the privacy laws that we have, it is very unlikely that if someone has a child that’s over 18 and they need to help them with a medical decision if they’re in a car accident. Um, if they need to help them with banking because they’re having financial issues, something of that nature. Um, even just something as simple as, um, for, I’ll use my son as an example. Um, he takes ADHD meds and they’re controlled substance. So I couldn’t pick up his prescription at the pharmacy, um, because he’s an adult. Right. And, and I didn’t have that permission. Um, so I had to deliver his paperwork up to the, to the, to the pharmacy. Um, kind of a silly thing. But, um, I’ve had friends whose kids have been in car accidents up at college and, um, you know, they couldn’t talk to the nurse to get an update or anything like that. Um, so it’s definitely really important these days to get those medical power of attorney, um, statutory power of attorney attorney. That’s the non-medical one. So that’s the everything else document. Um, it’s really important for parents to get those two documents, um, for their children because first of all, an 18 year old doesn’t know they need them.

Carrie Kemper Allen: So we’ve got to guide them, right? Hey, I know that you don’t want me just to cut you off and throw you out. Um, you still want me to help you grow up and manage school and things? Um, what if they want you to help them pay for it? What if you’re helping them pay for school and you need to talk to the college? Um, you know, all those little things that we don’t think of as a big deal. And, and they may not really and truly, in the grand scheme of things, be a big deal, but because of privacy laws, they are a big deal. Um, so I just suggest to those parents, let’s get those kids, um, a medical power of attorney. Let’s get them a statutory durable power of attorney and let’s get them a HIPAA letter that says you can access their medical records. And then let’s explain to them why we’re doing this. This is not so mom can take over your stuff. This is not so. Dad can micromanage you. This is so if you need help. We can help you without having to jump through a bunch of legal. Whoops. Whoops.

Trisha Stetzel: I love that. So estate planning something we need to go and take care of. So that if something happens to us that everything is in order and taken care of. And on top of that, some other paperwork that we need to do as our kids are aging, they turn 18 so that we can still be involved and gosh forbid you have to go pick up a prescription for them or talk to the school. You don’t have access without this paperwork. That’s so important.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Oh, and I’ve seen a couple of colleges lately who, um, have started putting out their own forms. Um, and I had a client actually call me and say, hey, I got this form from my daughter’s school. Um, it’s a medical power of attorney. They want you to sign it so that the kid can go to the medical facility on campus. Um, I mean, I thought that was a great idea. Um, because where, where’s your kid likely going to go if they’re living on campus and they get a fever or something, you know, that’s probably where they’re going or to the minute clinic. Um, so I’ve really seen a big uptake in universities and colleges doing things like that. Um, and I’m sure our friends out there will have noticed there’s all kinds of ads for that stuff online. Um, and you know, the discounted services that you can find online to do that. Um, and I have told a couple of people, you know, you’re welcome to get those, those documents online, just like you’re welcome to get them for yourself online. Um, but the issue that I see as a, as an attorney on the back side of that is people don’t understand what they’re signing and they have questions.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Okay. The that form, it can’t explain that to you and the form doesn’t also also doesn’t know all the nuances with your family situation. Um, so I always suggest to people, yes, you’re welcome to do that. And sometimes in a pinch, those are really the only option you have. Right? Um, but if you can, it’s always good to sit down with a professional, whether it’s me or any other, you know, legal professional who can explain to you why you need the document, what permissions it gives, how you can limit it or make it more broad. Um, because those are things that, that, that’s why we’re here, right? To, to help explain those things. Um, and then one of the things I like to do with the kids is I always kind of give them the, if I’m, if I’m here and available in the office, I’m not always able to do it, but just give them the, hey, look, here’s my card. If you get into trouble. Don’t talk right. Like, remember your, you know, remember your right to silence, right? Remember your right to an attorney. Those those aren’t just things that we say. Those are real things.

Carrie Kemper Allen: And, and, you know, take a picture of my card and stick it on your phone. If you need to call me first, I’ll call your mom for you. It’s fine. You know, just so that they know that there’s somebody on their side. That if they screw up real bad, you know, it’s not the end of the world. And we can help them. But if you screw up, you don’t want to compound a mistake, right? Like you, you’ve already screwed up. You’ve already made. You’ve already had an error in judgment. Let’s make good, good choices going forward from that point so that we can avoid the worst long term, you know, consequences. And I always like to do that because I feel like that’s one of those things. I was a good kid. I didn’t get into trouble, but I had friends and nobody ever told them that. Nobody ever said, you know, we were always taught. And I’m not saying it’s bad. You know, the police officers are the helpers. And I totally agree that they are. But if you are the one who is being questioned at that very moment, they are not the helper. Um, so yes, I.

Trisha Stetzel: Tried to get to the bottom of the problem.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Right? Right. So if I need help with a problem, I want them. Um, but if I am the problem, I need to protect myself.

Trisha Stetzel: Yeah.

Carrie Kemper Allen: And then again, reminding the kids, please don’t be the problem. Right? Like make good choices. Yeah.

Trisha Stetzel: This is, this is not a good excuse.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Right? And there’s value in having someone who’s not mom tell you that. Right?

Trisha Stetzel: Of course.

Carrie Kemper Allen: And give you a safe outlet.

Trisha Stetzel: Yeah. For sure. When I, I guess I, you know, for me, Carrie, just thinking about wills and all of those things, it’s and estate planning, it’s all for leading up to my demise and making sure that my family is taken care of. But there’s so many things that we need to think about while we’re still here that are very important. So for all of my friends out there who are my age, who do not have wills, can you tell us what happens, especially in the state of Texas, if you pass without a will?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. So in Texas, the answer is it depends. Um, and, and we kind of have two buckets, right? Like are you a married person? Are you a single person? That’s kind of our first starting point. So if you’re a married person, then we have to decide, do you have kids? Well, do you have kids? Do you have kids with your spouse or do you have kids from a prior relationship? Oh my goodness. Sorry. You know this.

Trisha Stetzel: I know the routine. It’s okay.

Carrie Kemper Allen: You do. And I even have my lamp on today. I know.

Trisha Stetzel: So for those of you who are not watching and only listening carries lights go out after a certain period of time. So it went dark in our office. We’re back.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Okay. Sorry. Just. It’s not every time. Ah. Um, so we have to decide kind of where your family fits in that and in our, you know, traditional 1960s nuclear family, that’s not such a big deal because it does go to the spouse and then to the kids because the kids are of the marriage, but not that’s not our families anymore, right? Like our families are blended these days. And, and, you know, we may be on a second marriage or we may have kids from another relationship. Those things all come in to set out how Texas determines your property passes without a will. So the number one rule is if you want to decide how your property is passed, you need a will. If you’re okay with the state of Texas telling you how it gets passed, they don’t get to keep it, but they get to decide how it gets passed. If you’re okay with that plan, you don’t need a will either. But I’ve, you know, it’s very, very infrequently that I find somebody who’s like, yeah, I’m okay with that plan because it’s just awkward. It cuts out the surviving spouse a lot of times. Um, and we, we have so many families where the surviving spouse. Yeah, it may be the second spouse, but maybe they got maybe they’ve been married for 40 years. Um, I had one a couple of weeks ago. They had been married for over 40 years and all of their children were children together.

Carrie Kemper Allen: But she was not the first spouse. Um, you know, so it just kind of throws a little wrench in there, right? Um, and they had, he had a child from his earlier marriage that was an infant that she raised, um, you know, really unfortunate situation with a tragedy that started that, that second family for him. Um, but that was his wife and the only mother that child ever knew. Right. Um, so that family obviously is treated a little differently than a blended family who came together with all grown up children and married late in life. But the law doesn’t see any difference in those two families. Wow. Um, so I, I definitely recommend you got to get a will and, and in Texas, we have this great provision, um, that allows us to do handwritten wills. So if, you know, budget is an issue, which I totally understand, it always is. And, and, and you can’t swing it to make it to work with a professional handwrite a will, a handwritten will is better than nothing. Don’t type it up and sign it. Do all those things because that’s where people get into errors. Uh, because we have certain ways it has to be signed to make it official. Just handwrite it, handwrite it until you can meet with a professional and then meet with a professional.

Trisha Stetzel: Absolutely. So speaking of meeting with a professional, Carrie, what is the best way? Because I know people are already like, oh my gosh, I really need to talk to Carrie. What’s the best way to reach out to your office if they have questions or want to pursue getting their estate planning done?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Of course. So they can always go to our website, it’s k.com. Um, there’s an inquiry button on that website. Um, but if they want to reach out directly to either myself or my amazing paralegal, Marla, um, you can always email us directly and we have an intake email and it’s I n t a k e intake at callen-lorde dot com. So either one of those are great. Um, we certainly don’t mind if you want to email us directly. That’s not a big deal. Um, but if you want to use the inquiry form on the website, that’s great as well.

Trisha Stetzel: Perfect. I love that shout out to Marla. She’s amazing. She is amazing.

Carrie Kemper Allen: She is.

Trisha Stetzel: Alright. I want to tackle what I find most important because as you know, I have gone through this recently and it has been such a learning experience. I’ve told everyone that knows me, I’m going to write a book about it because what I didn’t know, I didn’t know, and now I know some, but I didn’t know everything. I want to talk about probate. So at a very high level, tell us what probate means. And then I’m going to ask you some questions because I’m still curious.

Carrie Kemper Allen: So if you have a will, the will doesn’t pass anything legally until it’s admitted to probate in Texas. So probate is really just the, the process of taking the will to the courthouse and getting it approved by the probate court and admitted to probate. There’s a whole bunch of different kinds of probate in Texas. Well, I won’t say whole bunch. There’s more than one. Um, and, and some of them require us to do a little more work after we get to the courthouse. And some of them don’t require as much work getting to the courthouse. Um, but probate is that process of making the will authenticated, proving that it’s legit, putting it on the record. Um, and then at that point, allowing it to be used for the official transfer of property.

Trisha Stetzel: Okay. So can it only be probated after the person passes?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Yes. And I get that question a lot. You. There is a way to put your will on file in the courthouse. I don’t see anybody doing that in the last, like, ten years or so. Um, it seems like one of those things that we used to do before we had word processors and the will was like this big sacred piece of paper. Now that we can reprint it, if you want to change something all the time. It’s, it’s not as big of a thing. Um, but yeah, we, we don’t take it down there until you pass away. And then it depends on the type of probate that we do. As to your extensive, your involvement with the court after that process and again, in in probate in Texas, it’s not always scary. Um, you know, you have a will you take it down to the courthouse? We have a hearing. Uh, Marla and I file a bunch of pleadings for you on your behalf. Uh, we go down to the courthouse, we have a quick little hearing. Sometimes it’s a Zoom hearing. Um, and, you know, and, and then we help you with the back end of what needs to happen, but nothing can legally transfer until that will is officially probated and there’s an executor. It’s just not effective. It’s just a piece of paper until we get it admitted to the court.

Trisha Stetzel: Yes, yes and yes. And oh, by the way, y’all, even if you have like full power of attorney when your person is still alive, uh, when they pass away, you don’t have any authority any more until the will is fully probated and done. All of the stuff in court absolutely carries. Amazing. By the way, I’m just shout out to Carrie and Mala. Uh, and we did, we did Zoom. Uh, and it wasn’t scary. It was not scary at all. It was just I didn’t know what I didn’t know. And so between the time that my grandmother passed away and we got the will probated, I had no control over any thing. And I’m the executor for her will, by the way, you guys. So that’s why I had full power of attorney to begin with, but it was it was just really, really interesting to me. Now, you and I were having a conversation not that long ago about something called Lady Bird, I believe is what you called it. Can you tell me what that is again?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Sure. It’s another kind of one of those buzzwords that’s floating around out there a lot, but for good reason. It’s a really great option for a lot of families. So as families, you know, age in their estates simplify. And I mean, I’m not talking about we age like to 90. I’m talking about we like retire and we start consolidating our assets. We just don’t have as many things out there anymore. So many of our assets are, um, beneficiary designated, right? So I have a bank account and it says all to my husband on it or it goes to my kids after, you know, I pass away, that’s a beneficiary designated asset. Those items don’t go through probate. Um, so the things that go through probate are like, um, assets that don’t have a beneficiary designation. So you forgot to put one on your 401 K because. Whatever reason you did or it happens so often. Um, but your house is generally your biggest non profit, your, your biggest asset. And it’s generally along with a retirement account, the biggest asset that people have. Um, so you’ve got this valuable asset that has to go through probate in order to be transferred. So you have two options for avoiding probate. You have a trust, um, which is complicated and not always for everyone. Um, and then you have a deed, um, which is called a lady bird deed and a lady bird deed is, is a transfer on death deed.

Carrie Kemper Allen: They’ve been around for a long time. The lady bird deed is a Texas specific document. It’s, um, it’s created by an by, uh, case law and not by statute, if I remember correctly, the terminology. Um, and so it does a very same thing as a, a very similar thing as a transfer on death deed. But the cool thing about it is. You sign it when you’re alive. Um, and it basically allows your property to stay in your name and you own it and you can do whatever you want with it until you die. And then when you die, it goes to whoever you put on there. Um, so it’s really, really nice because, um, let’s say I, I, I age and I need to move out of my home. Right? But I’ve already lady bird deeded it to my kids. Um, that’s okay, because if I don’t own it when I pass away, doesn’t matter. I can still sell it. I don’t have to have my kids permission to sell it. Um, it’s kind of its own very special little, I don’t know, surprise. I really like it. It’s a really great option for so many families because if all of their big assets, their bank accounts and, and their retirement are, are going to go directly to their, to their beneficiaries.

Carrie Kemper Allen: The only thing we have to probate is their house and some cars, and there’s some really easy ways to handle our cars. Now, of course, this is not for everyone. If if you’re telling me your family is going to fight tooth and nail over everything you have, this option is not for you. Um, you know, and if you have a, a gazillion assets, you know, we have some, some clients come in and they have a hundred, a hundred toys, right? You know, they have boats and RVs and, and all these fun, great things, which I’m so glad that they have. Um, but then we have to change title on, you know, 15 things, you know. So we’re talking about a simple estate, right? That’s got a house that’s, or maybe a car. That’s really their only thing that’s not going to have to go through, that’s going to have to go through probate. Um, and it’s a really good option for those people. Um, it’s, it’s definitely a lot less than the cost of probate. Um, and they’re, really popular right now. Everybody’s everybody’s talking about them. Um, but for good reason. It’s a good option for sure.

Trisha Stetzel: And Carrie, can you help people with that as well?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Absolutely. They’re, they’re relatively easy to do. We pull up your legal description. Um, most of the time it is not affected by whether you have a mortgage or not. But most of my clients that are asking for these, you know, they’ve paid off their home, you know, they’ve lived in their home their whole life. We’re not talking about people that, um, generally I don’t see that being, you know, I don’t see clients doing that when they have a mortgage, you know, because if you have a mortgage, there’s more complications right after you’re after you pass, somebody’s got to pay that off, somebody’s got to sell your house and that kind of thing.

Trisha Stetzel: So yeah, we went through that. Um hum. Yeah, yeah. Right. Yeah. Right, right. I understand completely. Like I said, I’m going to write a book. I didn’t know what I didn’t know and I still don’t know at all. I’m still learning.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Well, I don’t claim to know it all either. I mean, I’ve been doing this for 20. It’ll be 23 years this year. And, um, I mean, they used to joke with us when we were in law school and even when I was a young attorney. You know, it’s the practice of law, like practicing medicine, right? Like you, you’re, you’re always practicing to be better at it. And I definitely feel like there’s still things I learn. Um, I definitely am not an expert. I would not claim to be an expert. Um, but I do like what I do and I’m pretty good at it. So, you know, I mean, yeah.

Trisha Stetzel: I love that. Okay. I know our time ran out so fast. This was amazing. So I know some people who are listening, Carrie already want to connect with you. They’re like, I gotta do the thing because it’s really important. And I know and I understand and other people are even more confused than when we started because they just don’t know where to start. So if someone listening knows they need to get started and get their estate in order, but hasn’t hasn’t even started yet. Yeah. What’s the first step that they can take right away?

Carrie Kemper Allen: They need to make an appointment with a professional. I mean, it just you don’t know what you don’t know. And you’ve said that several times, you know, during this. You know, you don’t know what you don’t know. And if you don’t know how the law is going to affect your family, you can’t make the right decisions. Um, now you can always start out by handwriting a little will not a problem. Go ahead and do that. It doesn’t hurt anything. Um, but again, you don’t know what you don’t know. So. So find a professional, even if all you’re doing is just consulting with them to get an idea of where to go, what needs to happen. It’ll give you clarity on where you need to go and what steps you need to take, because there are steps you can take on your own.

Trisha Stetzel: Yeah. Y’all don’t wait. Please take action because if you don’t, the state gets to make all of the decisions for you after you’re gone. And no one no one. I shouldn’t say no one. Most people don’t want that.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Well, and the other thing, Trisha on that too, and I’m telling people this all the time, it costs three times more and takes three, four times as long to do it, you know? So leave the plan. Have the peace of mind for yourself and for your family. You know, it just it’s it’s worth that, right? Like having that peace of mind and knowing I took care of my business. Yeah. It wasn’t the most fun thing to talk about. It’s not what I want to meet up on Saturday and chit chat over, you know, the game. But it’s important and it’s important for the people we’re leaving behind.

Trisha Stetzel: It is absolutely true. And, um, so from me to all of you who are listening, invest in that now. While you can still make those decisions, it will make all the difference in the world.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Absolutely, absolutely.

Trisha Stetzel: Everything that comes after that. So carry one more time. If people want to engage with you or reach out to your office, what’s the best way to do that?

Carrie Kemper Allen: Yeah. So they can go to our website, it’s K Allen law.com. Um, or they can email us directly and it’s intake I n t a k e@law.com. Perfect. And you.

Trisha Stetzel: Guys, I feel like it should be Halloween, like we should tell ghost stories because Carrie’s office went dark and.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Light.

Trisha Stetzel: Went off again. Here it comes. It’s all good. Carrie, thank you so much for spending the time with time with me today. Um, I really, really appreciate you helping build some clarity around estate planning and probate and even some of the other programs or things that you’re doing for people and you’re amazing. Your office is amazing. And I love that. Not only do you treat everyone in your office as family, but you treat your clients like family too. So thank you.

Carrie Kemper Allen: Yeah, I appreciate it. Thanks for giving me the opportunity today. Trisha. It was really fun.

Trisha Stetzel: Absolutely. All right, you guys, that’s all the time we have for today. If you found value in this conversation that I had with Kari, please share it with a fellow entrepreneur, veteran, or Houston leader ready to grow or that sandwich family that, you know, that has growing kiddos at home and is caring for aging parents and grandparents. Also, be sure to follow, rate, and review the show. It helps us reach more bold business minds just like yours and your business. Your leadership and your legacy are built one intentional step at a time. So stay inspired, stay focused, and keep building the business and the life you deserve.

Scaling in Public Tip: Growth Comes from Small Adjustments

March 30, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton: And we’re back with Business RadioX Pro Tips. Stone Payton, Lee Kantor here with you. Lee, we’ve been so blessed to have Coach Trisha Stetzel really quarterback this whole Scaling in Public season for us. And we have learned a great deal from her personally, working with her directly. And she had some interesting perspectives on this whole idea of growth.

Lee Kantor: Yeah. I think this is why we like Trisha so much. She’s on the same page with us when it comes to a lot of these things. But when she explains it, it just seems like, “Duh, it’s right there. How come we’re not doing more of this?” But when she was talking about growth, she said growth usually comes from small adjustments, not massive overhauls. And a lot of founders feel like they need the perfect strategy, the perfect system, or the perfect plan before they make a move. But progress rarely works this way.

Lee Kantor: Most of the time, progress happens by small improvements, little, tiny tweaks of the message, adjustments of the sales process, refinement of the offer, improving one step at a time on the onboarding. Each change might feel minor by itself, but over time, those positive adjustments compound. And you know, I am a big fan of compounding.

Lee Kantor: But compounding is really how the progress occurs. It’s not about perfection. It’s just about consistently getting a little bit better every single day. What are you doing today to get a little bit better? And by doing that and stacking these wins and racking up this progress bit by bit is going to get you to your goal. You will grow if you are relentlessly pursuing these small adjustments.

Scaling in Public Tip: Ideal Client Profile

March 27, 2026 by angishields

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Stone Payton : Welcome back to Business RadioX Pro Tips. Lee Kantor, Stone Payton here with you. Lee, we have learned a ton already in this Scaling in Public series that we’re doing.

Stone Payton : For those of you who don’t know, Lee and I made the decision to invite some of the nation’s top coaches to give us some counsel on this effort of ours to continue to expand the network, grow the business, scale this, and bring this opportunity to entrepreneurs to serve their local communities in many more places around the country and perhaps one day internationally.

Stone Payton : And I feel like, I mean, right out of the box, man, when we had, I think it was Todd Howard in that ideal client profile session, we learned some stuff that’s really already serving us, didn’t we?

Lee Kantor: Absolutely. I’ve been enjoying this so much, and I look forward to every single one of these coaching sessions. But from Todd, he is the kind of guru when it comes to ideal customer profile, ideal client fit.

Lee Kantor: He explained to us that the ideal customer profile isn’t just someone who will buy. They also have to be someone who can use the service or product easily and see results quickly. And that was a big mindset shift for me. That was important because – and it’s helped us kind of revamp our offering.

Lee Kantor: But he said the right customer should be able to implement without struggle and get a win fast. That really resonated with me. A lot of companies define their ICP purely around the budget or company size or industry. But if the product is hard for that customer to adopt or the payoff takes too long, they’re going to churn. And even if they were excited to buy, great ICPs don’t just purchase, they onboard smoothly. They get value quickly. And that early win turns them into a long-term customer and advocates.

Lee Kantor: So, here’s a simple test for your ICP. Can they implement this without a lot of friction? Will they experience a meaningful win in the first few weeks? If the answer isn’t yes, you might be targeting the wrong customer.

Clarity in Chaos: How Strong Leadership Drives Business Results

March 26, 2026 by angishields

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On this episode of Cherokee Business Radio, Joshua Kornitsky talks with Farrell Middleton to discuss what it really takes to lead, scale, and execute in today’s complex business environment. The conversation explores how leaders can cut through noise, align teams around clear priorities, and drive meaningful results without getting stuck in overcomplication. Farrell shares practical insights on leadership discipline, decision-making, and building organizations that perform consistently.

Brought to you by Diesel David and Main Street Warriors

CherokeeSponsorImageDieselDavidMSW

Farrell-Middleton-bwFarrell Middleton founded The Bell Curve of Life in 2022 to inspire positive change for individuals and organizations. His mission is to help people become A-level performers and support leaders in creating A-level environments.

Since launching the program, Farrell has connected with hundreds of people through one-on-one sessions, small groups, company presentations, contractor accreditation classes, and public speaking engagements.

After a successful 36-year career in residential land development and homebuilding, Farrell transitioned to his long-anticipated second career as a teacher, speaker, and author. This shift, made at age 57, has allowed him to share his passion for growth and leadership while engaging with people in meaningful ways.

In 2025, Farrell became a published author with the release of his first book, A Performer/A Environment. The book presents a practical framework for personal and professional growth and serves as the cornerstone of The Bell Curve of Life program.

Farrell’s programs draw on his extensive personal and professional experiences. A Georgia Tech honors graduate, he held senior leadership roles with both private and public organizations in the thriving Atlanta housing market. Over his career, he managed hundreds of employees, directed diverse teams, and navigated complex group dynamics.The-Bell-Curve-of-Life-logo

A Savannah native and the youngest of four, Farrell met his wife Kathy in high school. Married since 1986, they’ve raised two daughters, Pfeiffer and Collier, who now reside in the Atlanta area.

Follow The Bell Curve of Life on LinkedIn.

Episode Highlights

  • Clarity Is a Leadership Responsibility
    Leaders often underestimate how much confusion exists inside their organizations. Farrell emphasizes that it’s the leader’s job to simplify priorities and ensure everyone understands what matters most.
  • Execution Over Ideas
    Strategy alone isn’t enough. Farrell highlights that many organizations fail not because of poor ideas, but because of inconsistent execution and lack of accountability.
  • Alignment Drives Performance
    When teams are aligned around clear goals and expectations, performance improves. Misalignment, on the other hand, creates friction, slows progress, and leads to wasted effort.
  • Avoiding Overcomplication
    Many businesses struggle because they over-engineer solutions. Farrell advocates for straightforward approaches that focus on outcomes rather than unnecessary complexity.
  • Discipline Creates Consistency
    Sustainable success comes from disciplined leadership habits, regular communication, and reinforcing priorities over time—not one-time initiatives.

Transcript-iconThis transcript is machine transcribed by Sonix.

 

TRANSCRIPT

Intro: Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX Studios in Woodstock, Georgia. It’s time for Cherokee Business Radio. Now, here’s your host.

Joshua Kornitsky: Hey, welcome back to Cherokee Business Radio. I am professional EOS implementer Joshua Kornitsky, and I’m your host today. And I am excited to share with you a really, really unique guest that we’re going to talk to in just a minute. But I want to remind everybody that today’s episode is brought to you in part by the Community Partner Program, the Business RadioX Main Street Warriors defending capitalism, promoting small business, and supporting our local community. For more information, please go to Main Street warriors.org. And a special note of thanks to our title sponsor for the Cherokee chapter of Main Street Warriors. Diesel. David. Ink. Please go check them out at DieselDavid.com. And as I said, I’ve got a really, really special guest in the studio with me today, somebody that I’ve known for a while, but who really takes a different look at things. So I want to introduce everybody to Farrell Middleton. He is the founder of The Bell Curve of Life, a unique teaching program and author of A Performer A Environment, a Roadmap to Enhance Your Performance and Upgrade Your Environment. After a successful 36 year career in residential land development and home building, Farrell transitioned into his second career as a teacher, professional speaker, and discovery expert, and an author in 2022. His mission really is to focus, uh, in his mission and focus are to cultivate a level performers and a, and a level environments to drive personal growth and organizational health. If both can be achieved, success will follow and failure will be rare. A Georgia Tech honors graduate Ferrell brings decades of leadership experience to every session. Drawing on his real life insights to inspire meaningful change. Welcome, Ferrell, it’s really a joy to have you here.

Farrell Middleton: Well, it is great to be back. Josh, thank you so much for having me. I always love my time here at the innovation spot with you guys. I love it.

Joshua Kornitsky: There’s there’s a lot to talk about today. And I think it’s at a really good time because there is a lot of folks who need a lot of help. And I think you’re kind of uniquely positioned to help them. So only to help people understand sort of that background because we breezed through it. Tell us a little bit kind of the origin story of, of what brought the man to the table that’s here today. What, what led to that?

Farrell Middleton: Okay. Gotcha. Well, thank you so much again for having me out today. But again, as you said, I was a lifelong homebuilder, my primary career, but I’ve always wanted to be a teacher of sorts in my second career. Josh it’s been a lifelong desire. And I decided I’m only 61 years old and I’ve got a lot of years left. I just wanted to provide a different service to society. So in my early 50s, about ten years ago, I started deciding what it is that I wanted to do with my second career, and I developed the unique program again. It’s called The Bell Curve of Life. And the premise here relates to our. Everybody remembers from middle school the bell curve 20% in the upper category.

Joshua Kornitsky: Yeah, some of us weren’t so high up on that bell. But yes.

Farrell Middleton: You’re right. You know what? Everybody’s in the lower part. It’s something. Okay, let’s be clear. But 20% in the upper category, 60 in the middle and 20 in the lower. And from my program this relates to behavior skills, performance and results. And my goal is to get individuals in the top 20% of the curve in the areas of life that matter to them and those closest to them. It’s got to matter. It’s got to move your needle. I want people to spend time in areas that are going to provide value to them. And again, like I said, those closest to them, either family members, business associates, personal friends, whatever that may be. And so that was the that’s kind of the genesis of it. And basically when you have three people, you have a bell curve. Let’s be very clear relative to any particular skill or whatever the case may be. So that’s the general premise behind it. And so I’ve been doing this for a few years now. I love what I’m doing. I’m making an impact in people’s lives. I’m here to help people live a better life. Josh personally and professionally, that’s what I do.

Joshua Kornitsky: So let me back up and ask a few things. Question number one, which came first, the book or the the approach?

Farrell Middleton: The approach came first. Oh, yes. I never intended to write a book. I was not a good writer in high school. In college. Let me be very clear. I’m a math guy. Okay, let me be clear. So I never thought of myself penning a book. Uh, so the concept of everything came before the book idea. So.

Joshua Kornitsky: Okay, so so as you refined it and it’s important to help people understand this, right? I’m a, I’m a professional EOS implementer. I’m, I am a franchisee of a global corporation that’s using 25 years of accumulated knowledge to teach businesses a set methodology. You created everything you’re doing. I’m grateful to Gino Wickman. He he created everything I teach. Yeah, but you’ve created everything you teach. And and I’ve always kind of been in awe of that because that’s a whole different animal than than what I’m offering.

Farrell Middleton: Fair enough.

Joshua Kornitsky: Right. So, so what, you know, was 36 years.

Farrell Middleton: 36 years.

Joshua Kornitsky: 36 years in, in the building and, and, uh, residential development space. Correct.

Farrell Middleton: Yes.

Joshua Kornitsky: What did you take out of that that helped you build this? Is this based on, you know, I presume, were you managing people? Were you elevating people? How did how did the roots of this begin?

Farrell Middleton: Okay. Uh, no, that’s an excellent question. Thank you very much. Uh, yes, it started with that again. I started my career 40 years ago. I graduated from Georgia Tech in 1986 with a degree in building construction. And I’m one of those very few. I used my college degree the very first day of my professional career, which was with a company called Colony Homes back in June of 1986.

Joshua Kornitsky: Okay.

Farrell Middleton: But I was a manager at the age of 22. And aside from the physical nature of what we did with developing land and building houses, I’m a relationship guy. I you know, we all do a lot of reflecting at this stage in our life. Like I said, I’m 61, so I reflect back, but I’ve been a people person my entire life, and the product or service that we provided was a very necessary one, a very emotional business as well. Let me be very clear.

Joshua Kornitsky: Oh, 100%.

Farrell Middleton: Home building. It really, really is. But not only did I get valuable relationships and growth with my internal associates, but my external partners, the trades that helped us build the houses, bankers, mortgage professionals. I was exposed to professionals at a very early age with them running their own businesses. And how did it, uh, how did that work with my business and the services we provided back towards, you know, to each other? And so with regard to that, aside from what I call hard skills, which is the knowledge of what you do on a daily basis, the tasks that people perform, everybody’s got them. Uh, but I am now focused on soft skills. And you can take your soft skills wherever you go. And I think I learned with my, uh, again, being a manager at the age of 22, running a department and then having, um, negotiating abilities with trades and things like that. I was an operations guy. I got to know a lot of people really, really fast in my career. And I was also customer facing very early homebuilding is a pretty unique, uh, service, you know?

Joshua Kornitsky: Sure. And I think, I think it’s important that people understand the distinction. Right? You were you doing, um, like one on one custom home building or were you doing mass development, home building or both?

Farrell Middleton: Uh, I was a high volume guy, so I would put me in the mass, uh, side of that. I would not make a very good high end custom home builder. All right. I’ll just, I won’t get it out of the way right now.

Joshua Kornitsky: But the reason that I asked that is you still, you had to have those soft skills to make that resonate with people and to get people to want to spend money.

Farrell Middleton: Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, it was a big, big deal. And the other part of this as well, back when the customer interaction thing, and this is not what I was an operations guy. And so I wasn’t in the field, uh, you know, with a hammer and tool belt and all that kind of stuff.

Joshua Kornitsky: No, I understand, yeah, I understand.

Farrell Middleton: But what happens in residential construction is very young people, women as well, that are field superintendents, they might be engaging with their customers at the age of 22 or 23 in the biggest purchase of their life. Sure. So there’s an incredible exposure there. Just to human nature, uh, and how you deal with people’s emotions and very stressful situations making the biggest purchase of their life. Generally speaking, there’s a lot that goes into that. And so I was just able to learn and grow and absorb. And that’s the fundamental basis of my program now. It’s just like I’ve been alive for 61 years. This is 61 years of me being on the earth and how I can try to help other people live a better life.

Joshua Kornitsky: Well, so then then let’s, let’s ask, uh, let me ask a few questions about the bell curve of life and, and in particular, and I’m going to blend the line between the book and what you actually teach. So you, you may need to help steer me in one direction or the other because I want to give accurate information while I ask you my questions. My first question is, so let’s talk about what an A performer is. I know from from a set of standards that I was raised with and that I managed with what I consider an A performer. How do you define an A performer?

Farrell Middleton: I define an, A performer as someone. And I’ve identified in my main program eight traits of a performers. Okay, I’ve got 11 chapters in the book on a performer, but it starts with attitude. Uh, my first chapter in the book. And I lead almost every session I have with an attitude, uh, conversation. Josh, your attitude is the aspect or facet in life that has the most influence over your success and happiness. Other people and circumstances can influence it, but they can never control it. That is up to the individual. And so I start out with this. If you can maintain a positive attitude as often as possible, you can’t have 100% control all the time. You’re going to have good days and bad, all that stuff that makes life go around. But if you can do that, I believe most circumstances can have a favorable outcome. And so I start with that. But then I tell you my, my second topic, it’s chapter two in the book is wake up frame of mind. I am having unbelievable success and interaction with this topic.

Joshua Kornitsky: You can tell us a little bit about it.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely. Your day starts when you pull your head up off your pillow. It’s going to set the tone for whether you’re going to have a good day, a mediocre day, or a poor day. And yes, other factors come into play with children and pets and traffic and weather and just all that stuff. And all the.

Joshua Kornitsky: Yellow crap in.

Farrell Middleton: The sky. That stuff? Yeah. This time of year, for three weeks that we get, uh, you know, uh, barraged by pollen. But it starts with put your head up off your pillow. And I believe it, actually, the stage is set the night before. Now, I’m not a sleep expert. I’m not a clinical psychologist. None of that stuff. I’m just a regular guy. And I believe if you can put your head down on your pillow at night in a good frame of mind, you got a pretty good chance of waking up in a good frame of mind. To me, that’s just common sense. And so when I engage with, uh, my, uh, you know, people in my, my classes and we get on this topic, everybody’s raising their eyebrows like, you know what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And about a third of the people, um, comment when we get done that, that is one of the most impactful topics that we talk about. So a performer, you know, wake up ready to go. Um, next, you know, self-esteem, relationship building communication skills, if you can have a positive outlook and develop healthy relationships and communicate well on a routine basis, that’s a performer type stuff.

Joshua Kornitsky: And let me clarify on that one because the first two. Anybody can do meaning you can you can wake with intent. You can to some degree. Control your attitude. Right, right, right. But, but that relationship building, um. I would hazard to say, having known you for a while, something you’re pretty good at. But it’s hard when you look at a fully grown adult in the workforce to, to understand that. What you’re really looking at is an accumulation of skills and experience. Correct. Do you help people understand? Because not everyone has that innate skill. And the truth is no one has it innately. It has to be cultivated. Do you help folks cultivate and understand how to build relationships?

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely. Yeah, it’s a big part of it. Like I said, I’m a huge relationship guy. There are three types of relationships. Family, personal and professional, generally speaking. And there are tangents off of those, as we know. But those are your three main categories. And something somebody told me and again, family, you know, we all have family dynamics. Don’t need to get in all that. But I got, I got some Wackadoodle.

Joshua Kornitsky: Ain’t that long.

Farrell Middleton: Oh, I know, yeah, I got some wacky stuff. And then your personal relationships are your, you know, your church group, your friend groups, uh, athletic leagues, uh, you know, book clubs, things like that. You engage other people, engage with or outside of family and outside of work. And then of course, the professional relationships, which are obviously your work, uh, business associations, uh, you know, chambers of commerce, things like that. But someone told me years ago, and I have never, ever forgotten this. And this was mainly in my personal life. Relationships are a 60, 40 split between two people. And what that means is if each person can put in a 60% effort as often as possible, you have a chance of having a strong, solid, long term relationship. For example, my wife and I, we met in high school. We’ve been together for 45 years, married for 39 and we have a great relationship. But does it take work? Oh, you better believe it takes work on both of us. Everybody knows this. You’re going to have good and bad, but healthy. 60 over 40. If you can go into a relationship, no matter what kind it is, with that type of an outlook, you’ve got a chance of developing deep, strong, healthy relationships.

Joshua Kornitsky: What I love about that perspective of yours is, and I should clarify, I have a 23 year old daughter and a 17 year old daughter, and I’m very proud of both of them. But one of the biggest challenges as as I have gotten to know many of their peers. One of the biggest challenges is understanding, particularly when it comes to business, which is relatively new to my 23 year old. And my 17 year old’s not quite there yet, although she does have her first job.

Farrell Middleton: Excellent.

Joshua Kornitsky: Is that, um, when you are in a business relationship, people have, in my experience, um, Confuse that with the personal relationship from a perspective of if you want to maintain it, it requires effort. And you’ve just illustrated that because even if I’m not trying to sell, convince or, or get you interested in what it is that I do for a living, if I want to maintain that relationship, I can’t wait. I can’t take the approach of, well, you’ll call me.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely. Yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: You know, and I can share with you, and we know many of the same people, the people that immediately stick out in my mind are the folks who are very intentional. And like clockwork, about every 4 to 6 weeks, I get a check in just a yeah, just a ping, whether it’s a text, an email, or a quick phone call. Hey, just wanted to see how you’re doing. Um, but they stay top of mind.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely. Yeah. And one thing on that, that’s an excellent perspective as well. And what my main tip for developing healthy professional relationships, this is very complicated. Whoever’s listening now. I hope you’re with me. This is a really, really tough one. Are you ready?

Joshua Kornitsky: I’m ready.

Farrell Middleton: Return every phone call, text, or email in an appropriate time frame. If you can do that, then you will be regarded as a trusted source. Someone that’s reliable, someone dependable people can count on. Return every phone call, text, or email in an appropriate timeframe and appropriate has. You have varying methods. Urgency is different from circumstances, that kind of thing. But if you can do that, people will know that you’re there and they can count on you. It is unbelievable how simple that is, but it is crazy, crazy challenging to get this to happen sometimes. You know what I’m talking about.

Joshua Kornitsky: So I joke with, uh, with a friend of mine that I’m going to, I’ve ready, I’m ready to write my book. And the title of my book is have the decency to return a phone call. And when you open it up, it will have one page that says have the decency to return a phone call and that’s it. That’s the entire book. Okay. Because look, I get it. We’re all busy. And I know now with all the different types of automated outreach that goes on, people get peppered and hammered. But a good friend of mine, another implementer up in Nashville, shared with me, and I’ve taken this approach. I answer every LinkedIn message I get, even if it’s just to say no, thank you. And you know, the number of folks that and I’m not gonna lie, I’ve got 3 or 4 kind of canned responses because some of them are offering me opportunities from previous careers that I’m no longer involved in. Fair enough. So I have a copy paste to say, hey, I’m not doing that anymore, but thanks so much. Um, you’d be shocked at how many. Thank you for responding that I get that. It’s just that because we all know most of that outreach is automated. We all know that most people don’t take the time to respond at all. Yeah. Uh, but I’ve also picked up some interesting opportunities from taking ten minutes out of the day to do that.

Farrell Middleton: Sure. No, I think that’s an excellent. I try to do the same thing. I might not be as good as you are about that, especially with like the unsolicited type stuff and that kind of thing. But, you know, we have to decide. Yeah. But I think it’s amazing because what I’ll do is, and I try to be very, um, considerate of this. If someone is reaching out to me in a solicitous, solicitous way, solicitous, soliciting, yeah, whatever it may be, I follow offering services. Yeah. I’ve got tongue tied there. Uh, I if I’m not interested, I’m going to thank them for reaching out. But I’m not interested so that they can move on to someone else that may be interested. I try to be considerate of that because I think it matters. And I think if people could do that, it’s a respectful thing to do and people get it.

Joshua Kornitsky: Courtesy has not yet gone out of date.

Farrell Middleton: I agree and I cannot explain AI, AI.

Joshua Kornitsky: Ai can fake.

Farrell Middleton: It, it can fake it.

Joshua Kornitsky: So so we have attitude. We have the wake up mindset. We have, uh, relationships and take us to number four. And I know there’s eight, but let’s get to number.

Farrell Middleton: We’ll go to number four. Communication. There are two halves to being a good communicator. Number one is delivering your message in a clear, crisp and concise fashion, no matter the makeup or size of your audience, especially if there is a performance standard or a requirement. I was a home builder. I had to communicate well, that kind of thing. The other half of being a good communicator is being a good listener. And this is eye contact, body language, lack of distractions. And if the deliverer of the message is not being clear, crisp and concise, what should you do? Ask for clarity so that you know what you’re supposed to do. Again, especially if there’s a performance expectation based on the engagement. And one thing that I tell people, I’ve had random people come up at networking events and they know I’m, let’s say I’m in the coaching arena, which is the right place to be. They say, hey, is there some kind of tip you can give me. You know, just off the cuff. Absolutely. Be a better listener today. Everybody can be a better listener. And whether you’ll be a better family member, you’ll be a better personal friend. You’ll be a better working associate, be a better listener today. And it’s something you can do it right now. That’s the free tip of the day.

Joshua Kornitsky: My dad used to tell me, don’t just wait for your turn to talk. Listen to what they’re saying.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely.

Joshua Kornitsky: And it’s it’s a shocking fact that particularly in, in an engagement where there might business might be an outcome. Oftentimes people are telling you what they want or need.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely.

Joshua Kornitsky: Often times, and my lifelong goal is to ask better questions. And as I’ve improved that skill, sure enough, people tell me what their challenges are or what their needs are so that we can find some common ground and whether or not business results is secondary. But at least I then understand them. And that’s the beginning of that relationship.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah, yeah. And one other thing as well that I’ve learned, I’ve gotten more comfortable with this. And I think you probably have as well. I tell people what I do, I’m a professional speaker as well. And you wouldn’t believe how many, uh, engagements I’ve gotten by just randomly saying I do professional speaking. Like, would you come speak to my group? Sure. I will let people know what you do. And they will. They’ll know it and they’ll be able to, you know, be able to connect with you on that. It’s amazing.

Joshua Kornitsky: As a host here on Business RadioX, almost all of my radio related discussions start with, you know, please share. Tell me what you do. Right. And the number of people from solopreneurs to multi-million dollar companies who talking to CEOs, talking to owners who can’t articulate well in a relatively short space, what they do always surprises me. And that’s to your point, that clarity of message, there’s truth to to rehearsal. There’s truth to practice. Yes. Come up with a short response to. What do you do? Don’t try to. You don’t have to be funny. You don’t have to be clever. Yeah, I sell, you know, elevator carpets, whatever it is, so that people can then understand clearly what it is that you’re offering and, and be as concise and direct as possible, because people do get lost because they want to tell you I do everything. It’ll take 30 minutes for me to read you this list.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah, I agree with you and I’ve subjected myself to that before. And you know what? I’ve gotten better at that as well. Let me be very clear. I’ve gotten better delivery. We’re all we’re all working on it.

Joshua Kornitsky: There is.

Farrell Middleton: No.

Joshua Kornitsky: Done. Farrell.

Farrell Middleton: That’s a great point. Just yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: Today and how well I did today. And, and I think that that, that goes back to what you were talking about regarding confidence and in your program, helping them understand we’re human. You know, sometimes, sometimes I know I’ve, I’m still doing it today. I suspect you are as well. Sometimes I put my foot in my mouth.

Farrell Middleton: Oh.

Joshua Kornitsky: I say something stupid, and I don’t mean to. I’m not trying to be stupid. Yeah, sometimes stupid just happens.

Farrell Middleton: It just does. Well, one thing very quickly is when you meet someone, you have about seven to 10s to make that first impression. Make it count. Make it count. It is. It is unbelievably important and powerful.

Joshua Kornitsky: Ah, I believe it was, uh, the author, Malcolm Gladwell in one of his books, and I shared this with my doctor, uh, that some study somewhere that patients with a new doctor make their entire decision on whether or not this is the right doctor for them in less than 20s.

Farrell Middleton: Okay.

Joshua Kornitsky: Based on, you know, the the way and I’ll find that for you because that’s a good, a good stat, but basically based on the way that they walk into the room and the questions they ask and the attitude they have, hey, this sounds all very familiar. Uh, that that quickly they’ll decide whether or not this is going to be their doctor.

Farrell Middleton: That’s fascinating.

Joshua Kornitsky: And we probably have all at one time or another had very positive. And I know we’ve all had very negative experiences in that environment. And that’s an environment you got to be comfortable in.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: And even if it’s just for a colder checkup, you still don’t want to deal with a jerk.

Farrell Middleton: Oh, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. So no, that’s a that’s a great point.

Joshua Kornitsky: But so we’re halfway through your list and I want to stop and ask you before we get to the other four or if we’re going to hold this back so that people can find out or at the very least, reach out to you.

Farrell Middleton: Okay.

Joshua Kornitsky: How on earth do you get this information across to folks?

Farrell Middleton: Okay. All right. Great point. Well, I wrote the book. Of course, it’s available in all the right places, uh, audio versions out there as well. Uh, but I do, um, private sessions with companies. Uh, I will do, I like about ten people in a group is, is really optimum number, but it can go anywhere from 8 to 12, you know, that type of thing.

Joshua Kornitsky: Is it all senior leadership?

Farrell Middleton: Is it.

Joshua Kornitsky: Anybody.

Farrell Middleton: Can be senior leadership. It can be anybody. My a my a performing material can relate to any people of any level of activity, authority or responsibility. Okay. It’s just it’s life skills. It’s what I do well.

Joshua Kornitsky: And I think that’s a really simple way to express it, right?

Farrell Middleton: It is. Yeah. Anybody can get some benefit out of it.

Joshua Kornitsky: But I want to learn about what you do on Saturdays.

Farrell Middleton: Okay.

Joshua Kornitsky: Because obviously being being a coach and a teacher and a speaker, people can can reach out to you. But I want to know about Saturday.

Farrell Middleton: Okay. Well, thank you so much for asking. Yeah. I have developed a new part of my program and it is called 60 Minute Strategic Workshops.

Joshua Kornitsky: Okay.

Farrell Middleton: And my program and I was, uh, started out several months ago, late last year with two Saturdays per month. And, uh, I’ve switched to one Thursday and one Saturday per month now just because of scheduling issues and things like you learn as you go. Sure, we all know, but this is an opportunity for people to come explore concepts to drive personal growth and organizational health, which is what I do. So I have a 60 minute a performer workshop and a 60 minute a environment workshop. And in those we will review the eight components or the eight traits of my A performers. And I’ve got seven components to the A environment. In one hour. We will review each of those items in there, and everyone will develop a roadmap for how they can make improvements in their life that day. And I’ve got a self-evaluation form with a rating scale of one through five. Again, not very complicated.

Joshua Kornitsky: Keep it simple.

Farrell Middleton: Poor. Moderate. Satisfactory. Superior. Outstanding. As we move from topic to topic, rate yourself right there. And I believe initial gut instincts are generally fairly spot on. All right with us as individuals. So by the time we get done in an hour they’ve got a roadmap. What are the areas they need to work on if they have some twos and threes? Well, let’s work on the twos and threes. Everyone will have a different takeaway from this. That is the absolute beauty of this material is everyone that I sit with has their own takeaway because their own person with their own circumstances and things like that. And so I offer two of each of these on each day. I’ve got 9:00, 11:00, 1:00 and 3:00.

Joshua Kornitsky: Okay.

Farrell Middleton: They are in person, but I have now gone virtual with them as well. Okay. Every one of these is available virtually. And so I had my first one of those last week. Lady joined me from her office across town, and she joined us from 9 to 10 and then from 11 to 12. And it was fantastic. So from a convenience standpoint, this is really, really good, but this is going to be a game changer with this virtual access. Unbelievable. Immediate value comes out of these workshops.

Joshua Kornitsky: So the way you just described this is very different than any other type of coaching I’ve ever heard of because you’re. And I understand why now that you’ve given us some context, but you’re putting personal and professional into the same type of session. And I would have had you not explained the first four of of eight concepts on a performer, I would have said, no, that’s crazy, but I get it because I know that that wake up mindset, that attitude, that confidence, that relationship that absolutely applies to both sides of that of the coin and that you absolutely could have that conversation with six people in a room where half of them are talking about business, and half of them were talking about life.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely.

Joshua Kornitsky: Because I don’t think you haven’t given me the understanding, and I don’t necessarily know that it matters which way you’re taking it, because it’s valid information and learning on either side.

Farrell Middleton: Absolutely, yes. All the principles can go into personal life as well. And one of the other main premises of what I do is there are so many outside factors that affect us every single day, the highest of level, whether interest rates, government influence and other people. Those are the four main ones. Every principal in my program is 100% under the control of the individual. Adopt and embrace them and you will live a better life. So, for example, government influence. We have two major things going on right now in the world. At least two, two. Yeah, two really big ones that are they’re sucking up all the news time. It is basically the war over in Iraq, which is having worldwide effects, obviously, that type of thing at our level. Right. Joshua, you and I, we don’t control that right now. There’s nothing we can do. We have to be aware of it. Yep. Got to be sensitive to it, whatever it’s going to be. But we can’t control that. We can control what we’re doing right now. That’s the key. The other is the government shutdown with TSA. I couldn’t imagine having to go to an airport right now. Un believable. I am so disappointed in our government leaders. It’s unbelievable. And I think probably 95% of the people might agree with me, right?

Joshua Kornitsky: I would I would say at least 95%. And no matter a politically, it’s just bad for everybody.

Farrell Middleton: It’s bad. It’s just bad. And luckily I don’t have to go to the airport.

Joshua Kornitsky: Yeah. I’m grateful I don’t have any immediate business for myself.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: And so because driving right now wouldn’t be an option either.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah. That’s right.

Joshua Kornitsky: The price of a plane.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah, exactly. So. Anyway, so, you know, part of that is what I do with that is, and that’s where everybody’s gonna have a different takeaway. And the thing is, if somebody comes to see me in on my next one, which is in a couple of weeks on Thursday, they could come back in a year and get a totally different takeaway. Sure. Because their life circumstances have changed. This is a snapshot. Where am I right now in my life, and what are some areas that I can focus on right now to make improvements in areas that are going to matter to me and those closest to me? That is the key.

Joshua Kornitsky: Yeah, I can see that.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah. Yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: And it makes sense to me that it’s going to be a perpetually moving target.

Farrell Middleton: Mhm. It is. Um, people are always growing. They’re always changing.

Joshua Kornitsky: So Saturdays and Thursdays and in, um, where do people learn more about that?

Farrell Middleton: Uh, my website, the bell curve of Life.com.

Joshua Kornitsky: Which we publish all, you know, all your links, but I still wanted people to know and you have the schedule there.

Farrell Middleton: Got the schedule there. Yeah. I’ve got three months on the website. Uh, and actually I’m going to be updating. I’ve got, um, just finished March last week. I’m doing two per month, just one Thursday and one Saturday per month. That’s it. Uh, and so I’ve got, uh, April dates on there may dates. I’m going to be adding June in the next couple of days. So there’s plenty of opportunity to look in the website register right there through Eventbrite. It’s very easy register either for in-person or virtual right there on the website.

Joshua Kornitsky: Oh that’s good.

Farrell Middleton: And we’re setting up and we’re done. Yeah, it’s just the world is so easy these days with stuff like this. It is so easy. And what I like to say is from a personal growth development and educational standpoint, this is a layup. Me and my team have done all the heavy lifting. All you have to do is sign up and show up, and you will not be disappointed with the results.

Joshua Kornitsky: And how long are the sessions?

Farrell Middleton: 60 minutes. One hour.

Joshua Kornitsky: That seems like a pretty, uh, disposable amount of time. People can find an hour.

Farrell Middleton: They can. I think they can find an hour. And you know, part of this, it takes you an hour to go have lunch. It takes an hour to watch a news program, which none of us want to watch based on what we just.

Joshua Kornitsky: Talked.

Farrell Middleton: About. Yeah, but I know that that’s what it is. One hour. It’s a one time visit. And one of the things that I talk about, I do a lot of networking like you do, and I’m out there, you know, in the world with what I’m doing. We commit lots of quality hours every week and every month for repetitive things like business association lunches, BNI groups, powercore, uh, you know, um, providers, all the great stuff out there.

Joshua Kornitsky: Right?

Farrell Middleton: It’s many, many hours per month. I want 1 or 2 hours in your entire life and I promise you’ll leave with stuff you can do better.

Joshua Kornitsky: And if I’m there for Thursday or Saturday or both, I presume I’m going to be learning different things every time.

Farrell Middleton: Uh, yeah. Well, it’s just a one time thing. It’s a performance. It’s one do a.

Joshua Kornitsky: Performer, one.

Farrell Middleton: A environment. I’ll do them over and over and over again. It’s just repetitive. This is it. This is the only material. It’s just 1 or 2 hours and that’s it. And you’re done. Unless you want to come back and see me in another year or so. Whatever the case may be. But no, this is it. This is so simple, and I believe that this is just the best. And it’s $80 per session per year, 80 bucks. It’s a no brainer.

Joshua Kornitsky: A whole lot cheaper than than what most people would even even if it was just a personal, uh, consultant consultation. Absolutely not be that that inexpensive.

Farrell Middleton: And, you know, of course the math has I got to get people in the room. Let me be very clear. I’ve got people online. I mean, it’s, it’s, it’s a numbers game like everything else is. So I am hopeful that this will provide value and people will see that in one hour. And for $80.

Joshua Kornitsky: Have you gotten pretty positive feedback?

Farrell Middleton: I’ve gotten excellent feedback on it. That’s excellent feedback on it. Uh, I’m making a difference in people’s lives. They’re standing up, they’re walking out. They’re thinking, you know what? That was worth it. That was really worth it. And so that makes it that makes it that much more beneficial. Yeah.

Joshua Kornitsky: I’m really happy to hear the impact that you’re making. I, I will tell you, having known you for as long as I have now, I’m not surprised at the impact you’re making, but I am. But I am happy to hear it. And I know that it’s coming from your heart that this is, uh, this is not you trying to build a self-help empire. This is you just trying to help people.

Farrell Middleton: That’s it. That’s what I want to do. Like I said, I’m 61 years old. I’ve done a lot of stuff in my life, done a lot. I’ve been a successful career, the whole thing, good family life, all that kind of. We’re grandparents now, which is wonderful.

Joshua Kornitsky: Congratulations.

Farrell Middleton: You’re maybe not too far away from that. And let me be clear, it is better than anything anyone has ever told you. It’s wonderful. A little, a little little. You said she’s 23. You know, you got a few years. But I hope when we have our second grandson on the way, we’re so excited about it. But, uh. But no, uh, it’s just it’s where I am. Like I said, I’ve got so many years left professionally that, uh, this is what I do now. And I just, I’m a practical guy with practical experience. I just want to help people live a better life. It sounds kind of corny and cheesy, but. Josh, that’s what I’m about these days. I’ve done a lot and I have a lot to share.

Joshua Kornitsky: I think that that’s a fantastic life mission. Mhm. And you said that you, uh, you use a five point scale for self-evaluation, self evaluation. Where would you put yourself?

Farrell Middleton: Uh, let’s see. Well, overall, overall, I would probably put myself at about, uh, about a four. I think overall, we can always do some work here and there in that type of thing. And I’ll tell you, one of the things that, uh, one of the other eight is starting the day consistently. This is, I’m getting a lot of traction out of this. If you’re supposed to start your day at 8:00, it’s 8:00. Yeah, not 9:00, 930. And I’ll tell you, that’s one thing I’m struggling with right now. I was a very I lived a very structured life for 36 years, up early at the office at 7:00, home by 6 or 7:00 at night, whatever avail on the weekends, very, very structured. Now I’m doing stuff on Saturdays, um, here doing this on a Tuesday morning. I’m struggling with that in my new career.

Joshua Kornitsky: Yeah, weirdly flexible in ways that you just haven’t had to account for.

Farrell Middleton: I never, I never had to do this. And sometimes I have early meetings, sometimes I don’t have my first meeting until noon. And so I’m.

Joshua Kornitsky: It’s a funny thing.

Farrell Middleton: I tell you, I’m struggling with this. I’d give myself a two on that right now out of five. Yeah, so I look I work on these things all day every day as well.

Joshua Kornitsky: And I think that’s very humanizing for you to say. I’m a five on everything because I created this well. Yeah, good luck to you. But yeah, I imagine that the, the one thing that you that’s sort of in between the lines that, that you said and it touched on something we talked about sort of before we started, uh, the broadcast is, I think it’s interesting the way that you give permission to people to understand it’s just not always going to be a five.

Farrell Middleton: It’s not no, the world doesn’t work that way.

Joshua Kornitsky: And, and I love that aspect of what you’re coaching people on because that’s just reality. It is. And you will be set up for perpetual disappointment. If if again, leaning into the learnings that my children have taught me. If you believe what you see on social media, no matter where you’re seeing it, you’re seeing a highlighted, edited highlight reel of somebody pretend life.

Farrell Middleton: Good point.

Joshua Kornitsky: You will always be disappointed because it’s not limousines and private jets and yachts, because that’s just not realistic.

Farrell Middleton: It’s not.

Joshua Kornitsky: And to understand that nobody’s living at a needle buried on five, because that’s just not how the world works.

Farrell Middleton: Yeah. Well, one of the other topics in my program, I’ve got a bunch of material, but one of them is there are five work days in a week. One’s going to be really, really good. You wish you could just bottle it up and open it whenever you could. Doesn’t work that way. Three you’re going to be good enough and one’s going to be kind of crappy. And sometimes that crappy day is just getting home through the front door is going to feel like an enormous victory that day. But hopefully you put your head down on your pillow in a good frame of mind. You wake up the next day in a better frame of mind and you go, have a better day. It’s a bell curve.

Joshua Kornitsky: It’s the biggest takeaway that I get from this discussion and something I’ll certainly take home to share. Uh, let me ask last question. What is one takeaway you’d like people to know about the bell curve of life?

Farrell Middleton: Uh, I think my best takeaway here is that I have not created or invented anything. All I have done is taken principles that were all aware of that we all live our life through every day, and I have packaged it in a very crisp and concise way that’s easy to share. I’ve got the book. Uh, you know, I’m a professional speaker, so I’m able to deliver it well. And I’ll say that with all the confidence in the world, I deliver this message very well and people receive it very well. Come spend some time with me. And my promise is the material will be delivered in a way that you can walk out of there, and you can make improvements in your life personally or professionally that day. That’s my promise.

Joshua Kornitsky: You don’t even have to get in the car. You just do it over Zoom.

Farrell Middleton: Do it over Zoom. That’s right. Yeah, do it over Zoom. Just like, sign up and show up. That’s all you got to do.

Joshua Kornitsky: I can’t thank you enough. And. And I have to tell you that I’m leaving here with a whole lot of new thoughts in my head.

Farrell Middleton: Well, that’s awesome.

Joshua Kornitsky: Thank you. And that’s the to me, that’s that’s the best ingredients for success. Anytime that you can help somebody think about things in a new way, that’s a win.

Farrell Middleton: I think it is as well.

Joshua Kornitsky: Um, my, my guest today has been Pharrell Middleton. He’s the founder of the Bell Curve of Life. It’s a unique teaching program. And he’s also the author of A Performer a Environment, a Roadmap to enhance Your Performance and Upgrade your Environment. After a 36 year career in residential land development and home building, Pharrell transitioned into his second career as a teacher, professional speaker, discovery expert, and author. His mission and focus, as we heard today, is to cultivate a level performers and a level environments to drive personal growth and organizational health. If both can be achieved, success will follow and failure will be rare. Farrell, thank you so very much for sharing your knowledge and your wisdom with us. I also have to thank today’s episode. Or excuse me, I have to take a moment to thank, uh, the Cherokee Business Community Partner Program, the Business RadioX Main Street Warriors, defending capitalism, promoting small business, and supporting our local community. For more information, please check out Main Street warriors.org. And a special note of thanks to our title sponsor for the Cherokee chapter of Main Street Warriors Diesel David Ink. Please go check them out at diesel davidk.com. My name is Joshua Kornitsky. I am a professional EOS implementer and your host here on Cherokee Business Radio. Thank you so much for joining us. We’ll see you next time.

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